The Wife of bold

pinterest addiction is serious....

2012-01-27T07:33:00.000-08:00

How funny is this? I know i've been non existent in blogland for a while now but I just had to share this, I cried with laughter when i saw it! I found it whilst trawling pinterest (my new addiction). I waste almost every night of my life on that site at the moment, its a never ending fountain of wierd and wonderful stuff and a great distraction from my scriptwriting.

children vs husband vs Myself

2011-06-22T13:17:00.000-07:00

Do you ever feel like a dog just chasing round after your own tail all day long, never really accomplishing anything? Today has been one of those days, as have most days over the past 6 years. Me and Mr Bold have just had another almighty row regarding my lack of time, effort, energy, interest for him???
And it pains me to admit it but he's right.
I do resent spending any time with him, how awful is that? But after a constant re run of ground hog day, breakfast, school runs, work, washing, meal times, bed times, tidying up, reading, homework, breaking up fights, feeding the cat, dishes, lAudry I'm exhausted. I don't want to show any sort of affection in the from of a hug or kiss for fear of it being miss read as a come on - who wants to have to have sex on top of that daily to do list? After kids constantly pawing at me for the whole day long the one thing i want from my husband is to know he'll keep his hands to himself at night and let me get some sleep!

I don't want to bother making small talk with him either, i mean how many times can we have the same conversations and seem interested still. I don't really want to know about how his day at work went, I'm not interested, and i sure as hell do not want to relive my daily nightmare with blow by blow accounts of how Eva ran into the road nearly getting knocked over for the 1,000 time, Sofia losing her school shoes, Bella's eczema flaring up again and how I've offered to help out on the tombola stall for the school PTA to stop Mia's mindless moaning about how i need to help out at the school more because "Faye's mummy and daddy does and she always gets to help at the school disco, but your always too busy...it's not fair!"

The truth is i focus purely on the kids, i have too, and most of the time that's half hearted, i rush through bed time stories, let them get away with not brushing their teeth every night and feed them fish fingers and pizza most nights. I know i need to up my game but when i do finally get a minute i would like to spend that time on myself, pondering on my own thoughts for a change but i suppose that's just selfish of me.

The saying, you only get out what you put in is spot on, and that is exactly why my marriage is falling apart at the seams. The trouble is I'm not sure I've got the will or energy to put the mountainous effort in that's needed.

There is a saying that the best thing you can give your children is a happy marriage and unfortunately I'm failing miserably, so i suppose putting your kids first isn't always the answer but i just don't think i am capable of changing my priorities. How about you whats your solution to the kids vs husband vs yourself situation???? I need help and fast!

Cambridge diet!

2011-06-09T06:30:00.000-07:00

Today is my first day starting the Cambridge diet! I know it's a little drastic but I've been trying to shift this baby weight for over three years now and as the twins turn four this year i can hardly still be using them as a valid excuse for my ever expanding waist and hips.
A mummy friend of mine started exactly a year ago and lost three stone in three months and has managed to keep it off so i decided to take the plunge. It is rather expensive, at 40 pounds a week (sorry my keyboard wont let me use the pound sign?), but i never spend anything on myself so i figured i was worth it plus the prospect of being a size 10 again by the end of August is worth every penny.
The shakes are surprisingly appetising however the same cannot be said for the soups - I've just tried to force down a spicy tomato concoction but to be honest I'd rather eat feet so I've settled for a chocolate shake instead. The theory is to consume no more than 615 calories a day for at least two weeks. This includes three shakes a day plus a 200 cal meal consisting mainly of a little bit of protein and two tablespoons of veg/salad. I realise it's not going to be easy, especially with my sweet tooth but I'm determined to succeed - wish me luck, i have a feeling I'm going to be needing it in bucket loads.

Another year closer to the big 30

2011-05-19T06:36:00.000-07:00

So yesterday marked my 28th birthday and only two more years to go till I'm 30. Most people, my friends included, are horrified at the thought of getting older and whilst i must admit turning 40 isn't the slightest bit appealing to me i cannot WAIT to be 30!!
Why??? I hear you ask, well you see once I'm 30 i feel i will be able to justify my life choices, being married with 4 kids by the time i was 25 hasn't exactly impressed most people and whenever anybody ask my age i always cringe with embarrassment from fear of them judging me.
I know I'm probably being silly yet i can't help but feel people look down on me in some way for doing things the "wrong way around" i wasn't supposed to have started my family yet never mind have completed it. I was supposed to carve out a career and date lots of men. While my friends were out ploughing their way through one night stands and spending every weekend in nightclubs till 4am i was up till 4am feeding and changing nappies. Don't get me wrong i wouldn't have had it any other way, I'm no party animal and i wouldn't change my children for the world, but it just sounds so much better saying "I'm in my thirties and I have four children."

My twenties have been a successful(in respect of marriage and kids) but very stressful time and I'm under no illusions that my thirties will be any easier but I'm looking forward to pursuing a career as well as raising a family, and having a little more time to invest in myself along with the girls. I may even find more time for Mr Bold too as he's been far too neglected these past seven years.

I'm off to Leeds on Saturday to visit my best friend who also turns 28 this week and whilst she'll be drowning her sorrows at the prospect of getting closer to the big 3 0 I'll be swinging from the rooftops planning a monster weekend away (I'm thinking Vegas) for our 30th....i can't wait!!!

Silent Sunday

2011-05-15T01:12:00.000-07:00

Wordless Wednesday

2011-05-11T06:18:00.000-07:00

How to make a Book Wreath

2011-05-09T01:26:00.002-07:00

I've been covetting this beautiful book wreath for a while now, it's been doing the rounds on lots of blogs across the pond and so i though it was time to bring it to blighty!
Firstly you will need a foam wreath,or, if like me pennies are a little tight at the moment you can simply use a large circular bowl a a stencil and use good old cardboard! I had some lying around the house from the twins ikea beds.
You will also need a glue gun and glue sticks (approx 8 little ones), an old book you don't mind giving new lease of life, some gold paint, paint brush and scissors.

To start with you'll need to paint the edges of the book with the gold paint - it gives it that antique, rustic look. I did this the night before in order to let it dry in time.

Once the paint is dry begin by folding each page, you'll need lots of patience as you are going to use a LOT to fill out your wreath and don't forget to fold the bottoms too.

This is how i folded mine, somehow i'm having difficulty trying to describe exactly how - so i hope this helps.

Now start by gluing the pages around the inside of your wreath until it's full, use the folded tabs at the bottom.

This is what it will look like at the back of the wreath

Time now to fill all the gaps, be careful not to leave any spaces - the fuller the better

Finish by adding another layer to the inside of the wreath to make it bulkier and voila

Silent Sunday

2011-05-08T08:12:00.000-07:00

A belated Royal tea party

2011-05-07T08:42:00.000-07:00

Ok so i'm a little late on the uptake but i thought i'd share with you some pictures from our soiree, the girls had a fabulous time with lots of cupcakes and cucumber sandwiches, and I enjoyed a tipple or two of pimms.

I scoured blogland and found some fantastic free printable's for the straw flags and bunting, don't you just love bunting? It's so simple and effective, gets me in the party mood every time!

Here is Mia's classroom Pet Happy Star the penguin, enjoying a little tipple of pimms. We were lucky enough to spend the whole bank holiday with him

This is my gorgeous nephew Billy sharing his sandwiches

Some yummy party food

Party Time!

Mr Bold and the girls preparing to watch the Royal Wedding!

Just one happy moment

2011-02-24T09:17:00.000-08:00

My mother-in-law always used to say this and I recently stumbled upon a quote that seems rather fitting so i thought I'd post it:

Who will tell whether one happy moment of love,
or the joy of breathing or walking on a bright
morning smelling the fresh air, is not worth
all the suffering and effort which life implies?
Erich Fromm (American Psychoanalyst)

I have it framed on my kitchen window ledge so she's never far from my thoughts and if I'm feeling a little sorry for myself it always seems to make me smile.

I'm bored

2011-02-15T06:27:00.000-08:00

Nope this is not another rant about how the children are constantly moaning to be entertained, I, me the mother, am actually bored shitless! It's only day two and considering it's my holiday too you'd think I'd be grateful for the rest and non existent early morning madness - but I'm not. I'm secretly counting down the days (five)until normal service is resumed and i haven't the option to just sit on my exceedingly large behind. The weather isn't helping, it's just another excuse for me to procrastinate and let the kids turn our relatively tidy home into a bombsite. I had such high hopes for our long week off together, me and the girls were going to make dens, bake, read lots of new books, play with Christmas presents that are still in their wrapping, build Lego, go for long walks, feed the ducks, play hide and seek, go to museums, play areas and use public transport. So far we have accomplished none of the aforementioned. The poor girls have sat through back to back DVD athons of free willy, finding Nemo, Toy story, little red riding hood and Mia and Sofia's school Christmas production of Busy Busy Bethlehem!

I had forgotten what a lazy b**ch I really am, you see for me freedom is anyhthing but, too much choice makes me panic, i can't handle it so i just DO NOTHING, rationalizing that this is a perfectly reasonable option. I think i work best under pressure so with that in mind i have made promises to the kids that we will visit the museums tomorrow via the train, Thursday we will go to a play area and do crafts and Friday we can have a trip to the cinema leaving Lego and the rest of the to do list for the weekend. Now I'm off to help Mia find my engagement ring she lost whilst playing dress up (i let her have it so i could stuff my face with tea and biscuits in silence)....fingers crossed i fined it or Mr Bold won't be too happy with me!

Is anybody out there?

2011-02-14T10:00:00.000-08:00

HELLO!

Well it's been a year since my last post and I'm pretty sure most things will have changed in blogland but i couldn't resist dipping my toe back in the water so here goes.....Gulp! I'm pleased to report I'm no longer a stay at home mum, after six solid years on the front line of nappy ville I'm back in the real world and it feels great. I'm only working part time in a local secondary school but I'm loving every minute and it's great to know i have something other than gigglebiz, a sink full of dirty dishes and soggy nappies to get up for in a morning. I still procrastinate most of the time and my house is a mess but at least my life now has a little more structure to it and for the first time in years I have a zest for life again. The girls are all great and as gorgeous as ever, the Twins have finally started pre school. Long suffering Mr Bold has lost two stone (unfortunately i have found one of them) and is setting up yet another new business venture, which will hopefully be so successful we can buy our dream home and take several holidays a year if not there's always a caravan in wales. Enjoy what's left of your Valentines day, I'm off now to order mine and Mr Bolds Chinese takeaway x

Back from the depths.......

2010-03-03T04:58:00.000-08:00

Hello!!!

Thank God it's March, I hate, hate, hate January and February. Every year since I've had kids the beginning months of the year consist of relentless illness and bugs which constantly do the rounds through all six of us and leave me completely exhausted.

Anyway enough about that it's spring and time for new beginnings, yippee, hope everything is good in blog land and i haven't missed anything too monumental. I surprised myself actually, as i haven't missed blogging as much as i thought i would and my house is certainly thanking me for it, Flylady would be so proud. Although I have missed reading all the details about everyone else's lives(I've always been a bit of a gossip) So come on then any goss???????

2010 Is already a washout!

2010-01-05T03:22:00.000-08:00

Five days in and already twenty ten is proving to be as difficult a year as the last one. So much for my positive attitude and being thankful for life's simple pleasures, F$£K simple pleasures, i mean how can a cup of tea and a hot water bottle help me after a night from hell with three sick kids and a husband suffering from toothache?

I'm sat in my Onsie pj's trying to comfort two very sick little twins, with black rings under my eyes big enough to compete with Beetle juice, piles of vomit covered bedding and clothes, a kitchen full of dirty dishes and i just want some.........SLEEP!!!

I'm exhausted, my parents are on a bloody Caribbean cruise, my sister is snowed in and my sister-in-law is working so i have little chance of a helping hand and to add insult to serious injury Mia's school is closed due to snow so I now have to provide entrainment and crafts!!!

Well I'm off to wallow in self pity, tackle at least a few dishes and hopefully try to get the twins to have a nap so i can catch up on my sleep. Oh and Mr Bold is busy "Practising his Snowboarding skill", he's at the chill factor in Manchester with his friends preparing for his forthcoming French Ski trip....Sans Famille of course!! But that's OK apparently because he did "make a five foot snowman this morning complete with buttons and everything". Men arghhh!

What Makes you happy?

2010-01-03T01:08:00.000-08:00

After reading an article in the daily mail yesterday entitled " How to have a happy life", which lists the top fifty things that make you happy and best of all they are free, it got me thinking as to what simple pleasures make me feel happy.I decided to compile my own lists but before i reveal all here are my favourite ten out of the featured top fifty pleasures.

1. An early night
2. clean sheets
3. letting someone into traffic
4. hot water bottles
5. reading poetry
6. gossiping
7. giving to charity shops
8. running after a bus and catching it
9. Watching my children sleeping
10. walking barefoot in the sand

And now for my very own top ten free and simple pleasures:

1. Listening to my old CD collection - It's amazing how listening to Phil Collins can take me right back to my dad dancing whilst cooking Sunday Breakfast in my old family home and Mariah Carey's music box reminds me of all that teenage angst and blubbering over boys.

2. Finishing a good book - I love the sense of accomplishment you get, but i equally loath waisting all my time on reading a crap book.

3. Tucking up my freshly bathed and dressed for bed girls - I love the smell of their hair and knowing that they are all clean and safely in bed.

4. Having a clutter free and dust free home - i rarely spring clean but love it when i do, i feel light and trouble free.

5. Having a cup of tea in bed - morning or night, it feels so cosy and indulgent.

6. Visiting my nanna or another elderly relative - I wish i could make more of an effort to do this more often.

7. riding a bike - admittedly it's been years but i love the feeling of pure freedom it gives you.

8. A boiling hot bubble bath - pure bliss, but my skin has to be red as a lobsters when i get out to feel the full effects

9. Swimming - I haven't donned a swimsuit with my kids, unless I'm on holiday...EVER! That's all about to change though this year as I've very recently rediscovered my love of taking a dip in the pool and my jelly belly isn't half as bad as i fear.

10. Swinging - Hahaha no you filthy minded lot, not THAT kind of swinging, i mean actually sitting on a swing in the park with the kids and seeing who can go the highest, nothing beats feeling like a kid again!

I'm now going to tag ten other bloggers and ask them to list their very own free simple pleasures that make them happy, lets call it the "Ten best things in my life that are free" meme. Feel free to join in even if i haven't tagged you i don't mean to leave anyone out but there are not enough hours in the day for me to tag all my blog roll. So enjoy guys, i know i did!

MBNAD Woman
and one more means four
metropolitan mum
The Dotterel
Rosie scribble
Brits in Bosnia
The babbling mummy
Baby Baby
Crystal Jigsaw
Not far from the madding crowd

So long 2009...I'll be glad to see the back of you!

2009-12-31T03:30:00.000-08:00

Hi all! I hope you've all had a very merry Christmas with lots of turkey and mulled wine. After not getting off to the best of starts this crimbo (Mr Bold awoke on Christmas Eve with septic tonsillitis...again)2009 has ended up becoming the best Christmas I've ever had. Due to the very bad timing of Mr Bolds illness Christmas dinner in the Bold house had to be cancelled...i couldn't very well cook a whole turkey for myself now could I?

It all worked out for the best, my mum and dad took pity on us and invited all six of us over for dinner along with my Nana and my brother and we had a fantastic meal, PLUS i didn't have the stress of mountains of dirty dishes......PERFECT.

Another bonus this Christmas was the quality of the presents i received, i know Christmas is all about the giving not receiving and i don't expect anything too extravagant at all really but it's so nice to not just get primark slippers and a smelly set for once. Since the arrival of my girls, obviously all our energy and money is spent on them and Mr Bold and I are lucky if we manage to purchase a card for one another but this year we put in a little more effort and a few more pennies.

The result was a fabulous faux fur M&S coat which i LOVE, a beautiful watch, Marc Jacobs perfume, luxury chocolates and that was just from Mr Bold. God only knows what's come over my mum and Super Frugal dad but not only was all the girls spoilt rotten with baby Annabel everything, dolls, little people airports, garages....i could go on forever, Me and Mr Bold got some top presents too including my favourite Sanctuary toiletries and a lovely jumper.

However, by far the best present i received this year was these super sexy adult all-in-one PJ's from my little sister.....

And here is a pic of me and my brother perfecting our posing skills, i think we may have had just a little too much to drink. I'm sporting my new faux fur coat isn't it Lush?

Well here's to a Happy New Year everyone, i hope you all have a ball and that 2010 is the best year yet!

It's Snow good!

2009-12-22T02:17:00.000-08:00

I can't believe i haven't posted for over two weeks, the cold weather's making me so lazy i can't bare to drag myself away from the roaring fire long enough to write a post. The kids are so excited about the prospect of a white christmas and i've lost count of the amount of snowballs we've made, now that i am safely sat in the comfort of my own home i can enjoy the views of snow capped roof tops and white blankets on the ground.

We've had a busy weekend and the big girls have had non-stop fun, spending every evening since friday having sleepovers at Auntie S's house, Nannys house and we spent saturday and sunday at my bestest friends house in Leeds to celebrate her daughters fourth birthday. We managed to make it home in one piece, after poor Mr Bold braved the trecherous conditions and eventually arrived safely in leeds, What should have been just over an hours car journey had taken him almost four hours!

So now with only three days to go untill christmas we are sat watching the jack in the beanstalk panto i sky+ last night and i'm trying to gear myself up for more froliking in the snow, i've promised the girls we can make snow angels after lunch but it's bloody boltic. Tonight, myself and Mr Bold should have been having a rare evening out for a meal with friends but my babysitter (my mum) has cancelled on us this morning due to the weather, which is just pants because the sexy dress i ordered from Next online yesterday afternoon has just arrived and i was sooo looking forward to actuallly making an effort with my apperance for once and spending some quality time with hubby and other ADULTS!!! Never mind i suppose i can always wear it sat in the house wrapping the last of the christmas presents.

Santa Clause is coming to town......

2009-12-06T11:34:00.000-08:00

Guess who we've been to visit today? Yes the main man himself Father Christmas and all the girls got to tell him exactly what they'd like for Christmas and pose for a picture with him. Well all the girls except Belle, she got a little upset and refused to even look at him, yet she still accepted her selection box. I suppose three out of four ain't bad and i was pleasantly surprised at how authentic Santa looked, no whiffs of whisky or pee emitting from his costume and he was exceptionally child friendly which was quite a shocker considering every other Father Christmas I've encountered made it blatantly obvious they couldn't stand little nippers.

Here's my big girl Mia, she asked for a "tea set"

And my ickle Sofia who asked for " a dolls house"

Lastly Eva the Diva who wasn't at all fazed by Santa but she didn't manage to put a request in, maybe next year....

Commenting etiquette???

2009-12-04T02:36:00.000-08:00

I 've been flitting in and out of blog land lately, this time of year is so hectic what with Christmas presents to buy, trees to decorate and Christmas aside, i already have my hands completely full with the girls.

A recent post by Linda over at got your hands full called "ten reasons i don't comment on your blog" got me thinking though about my lack of commenting etiquette. I am the most disorganised person you are ever likely to come across and this extends to all aspects of my life from my friendships, children and my home. I am the person who never responds to RSVPS until the day before, posts invites the DAY I'm hosting an event, always sends belated birthday cards or just forgets completely it was your birthday and i have a stock pile of well intended thank you cards that i have never actually gotten around to writing!

Obviously i am most peoples worst nightmare but i like to think my friends find it quite endearing really, either that or they are so used to my lax approach to life that they just roll their eyes at me and accept I'm a complete flake. Blog land i fear is nowhere near as forgiving, but I'm afraid this lady's not for turning, I'm too set in my ways and as much as i have the best of intentions to "change" I'm like a dog destined to never learn new tricks.

I am ashamed to admit that i don't always reply to kind comments left on my blog posts. There I've said it, but this is not because i am not hugely grateful and chuffed to bits that someone has taken the time to acknowledge the dribble I've written (I smile every time i receive a comment, it's the best feeling ever),it's simply a shortage of time on my part. I always eventually return the favour and comment on the other persons blog or i acknowledge their comment, i hardly ever manage both. When i leave a comment on someone Else's blog i don't assume they will acknowledge it unless the post in question is a serious issue causing a debate and the blogger has already responded to every other comment. One of my favourite bloggers Maternal Tales is great at responding to every comment she receives and she always replies to my comments which i admit is lovely and so i find myself going back to check her comments but this is the only blog i return to check. Once I've left a comment that's it, there are not enough hours in the day to keep going back and forth commenting on commenting!

I have four small children which consume all my time, i don't make a living from my blog and i am in the process of starting a new business venture so my blog is purely escapist and a fun outlet for me. Yet lately the fun has been zapped out of this from the huge guilt i feel at my lack of blogging etiquette. I find myself avoiding writing a new post for fear of upsetting those last few lovely commenter's i have yet to respond to and worrying they'll be annoyed at me for ignoring them. Seriously just saying this out loud sounds absurd, so for anyone out there thoughtful enough to read or comment on my blog thank you and sorry for my laziness i assure you I'm very appreciative, It's just I'm useless and have no manners!

What Katie did next...

2009-11-24T08:02:00.000-08:00

So the Saga continues and just as Katie Price was winning me around with her "normal" down to earth persona and team player attitude she goes and pulls another publicity stunt and her true colours shine through, and to think i was actually beginning to feel sorry for her!

"The pricey" as she so annoyingly refers to herself ( i mean only idiots refer to themselves in the third person) has gone and dumped another fool live on national TV in Australia, it appears to be a failed attempt at a reconciliation with her ex Husband Peter Andre. I can't say it's a surprise as nothing she does has any shock value anymore, she's over exposed and desperate but why on earth is she putting her kids through this circus?

Peter Andre is no saint, of course it's a two way street and the way she has been vilified and thrown to the lions is absurd, it takes two to tango. Yet her Ex husband is discreet about his love life or lack of (yeah right your fooling no one Pete) and until Jordan, Kate, Katie, the pricey whatever she's calling herself today learns the meaning of the word she's going to continue on this train wreck taking her poor innocent kids along for the ride.

As for Alex i doubt he'll be shedding any tears, he's used her just as much as she used him and I'm sure he'll be making a tidy profit off the back of their liaison for a few years to come, cynical me? Never.

Spreading the love

2009-11-20T03:00:00.000-08:00

So I thought I'd do a good dead for the day and spread the word about some great sites out there (this is NOT a sponsored post)purely out of the goodness of my heart, yes I'm just that kind of girl!

If any new parents or parents to be out there are in need of a baby sleeping bag then look no further than The dream bag Company. This is, in my opinion, the best invention EVER and every parent should own a sleeping bag for their babies they offer peace of mind and ensure your little bundles of joy are always nice and toastie. Now i have to admit i may be a little biased as this site is run by a very good friend of mine Maria, it's a family run business and the quality of the bags are fantastic, i used them for all my girls. If you hop on over to the site you'll also see my adorable children modelling the sleeping bags(I did it as a favour in exchange for some gorgeous photos)and if you request a brochure my beautiful little Eva is on the front cover!

Secondly The lovely Emily over at Brits In Bosnia has asked me to mention the release of the X factor single "You are not alone" which is raising funds for Great Ormand Street Hospital. I was happy to oblige as i think it's a fantastic cause and i was in floods of tears on Saturday whilst watching this http://www.gosh.org/x-factor/the-charity-single/the-story-so-far/oscar/ Please everyone go out and buy the single, lets help little Oscar and all those other Children too.

"All 12 of this year’s X Factor finalists have released a fantastic cover of Michael Jackson’s You Are Not Alone in aid of Great Ormond Street Hospital Children’s Charity.

If you want to find out why Great Ormond Street Hospital needs your support please see Oscar’s video. http://www.gosh.org/x-factor/the-charity-single/the-story-so-far/oscar/ Anyone who watched X Factor on Sunday night will know that Oscar really was the star of the show!

Thousands of children just like Oscar, who really is an inspiration to us all, need the help of the amazing staff at GOSH and this single will help sick children from across the UK to get better. Some of the patients of Great Ormond Street Hospital appear in the official music video launched with the single on Sunday night http://xfactor.itv.com/2009/videos/player/item_200784.htm and if you watch this then I am sure you won’t fail to want to support them.

We are asking for everyone’s support in helping this single make the number one spot this weekend. Sony are donating all profits from the sale of the single and a number of retailers are also very kindly donating all their profits from the sale of the single (find out which ones by clicking here http://www.gosh.org/x-factor/the-charity-single/buy/ ). Please ask everyone you know to buy/download this single now – it doesn’t cost much but every single bought will make an incredible difference to the sickest children in the UK right now."

Bills, Bills, Bills

2009-11-19T05:44:00.000-08:00

I've had one hell of a morning and have spent the best part of three hours in floods of tears over an astronomical electricity bill that floated through my letterbox this morning. Scottish Power have kindly sent a YEARLY estimate to the tune of £1,987.76!!!

Yes that's right in the thousands, are they shitting me? I know i have four kids and a washing machine that's constantly doing a cycle but surely they cannot be serious? Well after several conversations with a clueless and unhelpful customer service representative (oh the irony) and getting nowhere I've left it in the capable hands of Mr Bold.

My stomach's in knots and it's completely ruined my day, I'm now wondering how to reduce the amount of electricity we use (no more tumble dryer sob)as well as all our other outgoings and am putting my frugal hat on trying to come up with ideas how to save some pennies. Whilst googling "how to feed a family for £30 a week"(we average £120 at the moment including nappies etc) i stumbled across this picture

The Ayme family of Tingo Ecuador survive on £31.55 between 9 of them a week. The photograph was taken as part of an article about what the world eats which can be found Here. Look at their lovely faces. I now feel slightly embarrassed and unappreciative, I'm busy worrying about an electric bill when this family doesn't even have an electric supply. It's a very sobering sight and has helped put my troubles in to perspective, i just need to learn how to be content with my lot and not to sweat the small stuff.

A change of plan!

2009-11-17T10:07:00.000-08:00

If you happened to read my recent post Flower power then you'll be aware I'm all set to become a florist! Well there's been a slight change of plan, after realising how much work and knowledge of the subject floristry entails we have now decided it might be best to open the shop my husband is leasing as wait for it.......A fancy dress shop!

I know, couldn't be further away from a shop full of flowers but it's a lot less pressure and depending on how well the shop does we can look into the florist idea at a later date once we are all set up. The shop has a massive upstairs which would be ideal for us to move the fancy dress to and we can use the downstairs as a home ware/florists.

So has anybody any ideas on names for the shop?? I'm wracking my brains for something not too tacky and original, let me know if you come up with anything!

Top Tune Tuesday

2009-11-17T04:50:00.000-08:00

I've decided to do a weekly Tuesday feature and include a "top tune" once a week, this week I'm kicking it off with Chaka Khan's "Ain't nobody." This is one of my favourite dance tracks and it makes me want to hit the dance floor every time i hear it....enjoy!

Rules for a perfect Family Christmas

2009-11-14T04:57:00.000-08:00

When an email popped up asking me if i would like to participate in the John Lewis "Rules" for the perfect family Christmas campaign, i couldn't wait to get involved and compile my very own list of favourite rules. Having very young children we haven't yet got into the full swing of our own "Traditions" at Christmas time. However times are a changing, now the twins are past the baby stage this should be the first proper Christmas all six of us can enjoy and join in together. I hope the list i have come up with will be the beginning of a life long Christmas tradition and something which the girls will continue with their own families when they've eventually flown the nest (I'm counting down the days).

1) Nothing says Christmas more than a good old Panto, so the day before Christmas Eve (23rd December) I take my big girls along with my mum to watch the local Big Production. Last year it was Cinderella and we spoke to Les Dennis in the middle of Lime Street Station as he was grabbing a Costa Coffee, he was very friendly and lovely to my girls. This year it's Peter Pan and we can't wait!

2)Christmas Eve is "Craft day." The girls dress up in their most festive outfits, last year it was red Santa dresses and we have a craft afternoon making star shaped biscuits to adorn the tree and reindeer dust from glitter, oats and shiny star shapes. We finish off with lots of mince pies and chocolate milk or mulled wine for mummy.

3) The girls Scatter their Reindeer dust onto the front lawn and then leave out the mandatory mince pie, pint of milk and a carrot for Rudolph.

4) 7pm Christmas Eve mass - We probably won't make it this year due to the twins early bedtime but I'm hoping by next year this will be the one family tradition we stick too every year. It's important to remember the true meaning of the holidays and to Celebrate properly. hopefully the children will realise there is more to Christmas than just presents!

5)We let the children open one present each before bedtime on Christmas Eve which is always festive Pyjamas. This ensures they look the part on the hundreds of pictures taken the next morning of them ripping open all their presents.

6) Relatives - We visit my parents at 10am to get the obligatory gift swap out the way and ensure they see the grand kids. This means we are safely back at home by 12pm and have the rest of the day to do as we please- no family politics and rules to adhere too. Instead we spend the day putting batteries into numerous plastic toys and splitting up several squabbles over who got the most presents from Santa.

7) A proper brunch complete with bucks fizz and smoked salmon with scrambled eggs and croissants, this helps to line the stomach in preparation for that huge tin of quality streets we'll inevitably polish off before dinner time.

8)Christmas Dinner is served promptly at 3pm with all the trimmings including stuffing and sprouts. We start our three course meal in style with a prawn salad (soup for the kids) but we NEVER finish it off with Christmas pudding - yuck. We prefer a blueberry cheesecake or good old mince pies with cream.

9) Lots of Wine to wash down your meal and it wouldn't be Christmas without pulling a cracker or ten!

10) The "GRINCH"- Christmas would most certainly not be the same without a bit of Jim Carey and "hooville." We watch this on DVD religiously every Christmas evening. Afterwards we play with the kids latest board games and stuff ourselves full of chocolates and turkey butties.

Feeling like the worlds worst mum....AGAIN!

2009-11-12T15:53:00.000-08:00

You know this past couple of weeks I've been so preoccupied with birthdays, parties, christenings, half term, vomiting kids, parties and more birthday's that I've sort of taken my eye of the ball in respect of my mothering duties. The house is in serious disarray, piles of ironing are strewn all over the house in every single room and i haven't cooked a proper "made-from-scratch" meal in ages. Not only that but the kids have been skipping their daily baths, not brushing their teeth at night and Sofia's fingernails look like they're growing mushrooms underneath them...OK so i exaggerated about the last one but still, I'm a bad mum!

Not only is their personal hygiene on a down ward spiral but i haven't been consistent with their bedtime stories and worse I've turned a blind eye to Mia's homework, she's now two weeks behind schedule and has misplaced her reading book!!!

Today my parental skills (or lack off) have come in for serious questioning when i arrived at school to collect Mia, to my horror i realised I'd completely missed Mia's parents evening the night before. One of the parents asked me how it went and it suddenly dawned on me......holy shit...I didn't show up!! The mums horrified expression did little to quell my shame and i set off to apologise to Mia's teacher with my tail between my legs. The teacher couldn't have made me feel any smaller when she informed me (rather to gleefully i might add) that Mia had become very upset this afternoon during story time when she realised her mummy and daddy had missed the parents evening and didn't get to see her work. I was informed to inquire about making another appointment on Monday and she might be able to fit me in for 5mins after school one evening.

Mia carried on the torture all the way home and really milked it with lines like "But mummy you didn't see all my very hard work" and "why has every one else's mums and dads been to parents evening but not mine?"

I 'm off now to compile an action plan, i think i need to concert all my energies into the kids and pick up my game, i suppose " you only get out what you put in."

Free letters from santa

2009-11-11T01:23:00.000-08:00

Sorry, i know it' still a little early to talk Christmas but like they say "fail to prepare, prepare to fail." I never adhere to this motto however, whilst i was busy surfing the net last night (avoiding the housework) i stumbled across these fab and FREE Christmas letters from santa Claus. All you have to do is pick one of the five designs, add the information you want the letter to include such as your home town and child's name and they then email you straight away with your free down loadable Santa letter. I can't wait to see Mia and Sofia's face when their very own letter arrives from the postman and I'm also going to send the letters to my friends children too. For all those big kids out there you could even send them letters as your never to old for Father Christmas right? My 23 year old sister is going to love her Santa letter, she's always been reluctant to grow up and what better way to indulge her inner five year old!

The website www.freelettersfromsantaclaus.com also provide free printable Christmas stories with a huge selection of choice ranging from "the boy who laughed at Christmas" to "Mama's happy Christmas." Below is my personal favourite, i can just imagine us all snuggled up in front of the fire on Christmas Eve reading this story together.

A STORY OF THE CHRIST-CHILD (A German legend for Christmas eve)

Once upon a time, a long, long time ago, on the night before Christmas, a little child was wandering all alone through the streets of a great city. There were many people on the street, fathers and mothers, sisters and brothers, uncles and aunts, and even gray-haired grandfathers and grandmothers, all of whom were hurrying home with bundles of presents for each other and for their little ones. Fine carriages rolled by, express wagons rattled past, even old carts were pressed into service, and all things seemed in a hurry and glad with expectation of the coming Christmas morning.

From some of the windows bright lights were already beginning to stream until it was almost as bright as day. But the little child seemed to have no home, and wandered about listlessly from street to street. No one took any notice of him except perhaps Jack Frost, who bit his bare toes and made the ends of his fingers tingle. The north wind, too, seemed to notice the child, for it blew against him and pierced his ragged garments through and through, causing him to shiver with cold. Home after home he passed, looking with longing eyes through the windows, in upon the glad, happy children, most of whom were helping to trim the Christmas trees for the coming morrow.

"Surely," said the child to himself, "where there is so must gladness and happiness, some of it may be for me." So with timid steps he approached a large and handsome house. Through the windows, he could see a tall and stately Christmas tree already lighted. Many presents hung upon it. Its green boughs were trimmed with gold and silver ornaments. Slowly he climbed up the broad steps and gently rapped at the door. It was opened by a large man-servant. He had a kindly face, although his voice was deep and gruff. He looked at the little child for a moment, then sadly shook his head and said, "Go down off the steps. There is no room here for such as you." He looked sorry as he spoke; possibly he remembered his own little ones at home, and was glad that they were not out in this cold and bitter night. Through the open door a bright light shone, and the warm air, filled with fragrance of the Christmas pine, rushed out from the inner room and greeted the little wanderer with a kiss. As the child turned back into the cold and darkness, he wondered why the footman had spoken thus, for surely, thought he, those little children would love to have another companion join them in their joyous Christmas festival. But the little children inside did not even know that he had knocked at the door.

The street grew colder and darker as the child passed on. He went sadly forward, saying to himself, "Is there no one in all this great city who will share the Christmas with me?" Farther and farther down the street he wandered, to where the homes were not so large and beautiful. There seemed to be little children inside of nearly all the houses. They were dancing and frolicking about. Christmas trees could be seen in nearly every window, with beautiful dolls and trumpets and picture-books and balls and tops and other dainty toys hung upon them. In one window the child noticed a little lamb made of soft white wool. Around its neck was tied a red ribbon. It had evidently been hung on the tree for one of the children. The little stranger stopped before this window and looked long and earnestly at the beautiful things inside, but most of all was he drawn toward the white lamb. At last creeping up to the window-pane, he gently tapped upon it. A little girl came to the window and looked out into the dark street where the snow had now begun to fall. She saw the child, but she only frowned and shook her head and said, "Go away and come some other time. We are too busy to take care of you now." Back into the dark, cold streets he turned again. The wind was whirling past him and seemed to say, "Hurry on, hurry on, we have no time to stop. 'Tis Christmas Eve and everybody is in a hurry to-night."

Again and again the little child rapped softly at door or window-pane. At each place he was refused admission. One mother feared he might have some ugly disease which her darlings would catch; another father said he had only enough for his own children and none to spare for beggars. Still another told him to go home where he belonged, and not to trouble other folks.

The hours passed; later grew the night, and colder grew the wind, and darker seemed the street. Farther and farther the little one wandered. There was scarcely any one left upon the street by this time, and the few who remained did not seem to see the child, when suddenly ahead of him there appeared a bright, single ray of light. It shone through the darkness into the child's eyes. He looked up smilingly and said, "I will go where the small light beckons, perhaps they will share their Christmas with me."

Hurrying past all the other houses, he soon reached the end of the street and went straight up to the window from which the light was streaming. It was a poor, little, low house, but the child cared not for that. The light seemed still to call him in. From what do you suppose the light came? Nothing but a tallow candle which had been placed in an old cup with a broken handle, in the window, as a glad token of Christmas Eve. There was neither curtain nor shade to the small, square window and as the little child looked in he saw standing upon a neat wooden table a branch of a Christmas tree. The room was plainly furnished but it was very clean. Near the fireplace sat a lovely faced mother with a little two-year-old on her knee and an older child beside her. The two children were looking into their mother's face and listening to a story. She must have been telling them a Christmas story, I think. A few bright coals were burning in the fireplace, and all seemed light and warm within.

The little wanderer crept closer and closer to the window-pane. So sweet was the mother's face, so loving seemed the little children, that at last he took courage and tapped gently, very gently on the door. The mother stopped talking, the little children looked up. "What was that, mother?" asked the little girl at her side. "I think it was some one tapping on the door," replied the mother. "Run as quickly as you can and open it, dear, for it is a bitter cold night to keep any one waiting in this storm." "Oh, mother, I think it was the bough of the tree tapping against the window-pane," said the little girl. "Do please go on with our story." Again the little wanderer tapped upon the door. "My child, my child," exclaimed the mother, rising, "that certainly was a rap on the door. Run quickly and open it. No one must be left out in the cold on our beautiful Christmas Eve."

The child ran to the door and threw it wide open. The mother saw the ragged stranger standing without, cold and shivering, with bare head and almost bare feet. She held out both hands and drew him into the warm, bright room. "You poor, dear child," was all she said, and putting her arms around him, she drew him close to her breast. "He is very cold, my children," she exclaimed. "We must warm him." "And," added the little girl, "we must love him and give him some of our Christmas, too." "Yes," said the mother, "but first let us warm him--"

The mother sat down by the fire with the little child on her lap, and her own little ones warmed his half-frozen hands in theirs. The mother smoothed his tangled curls, and, bending low over his head, kissed the child's face. She gathered the three little ones in her arms and the candle and the fire light shone over them. For a moment the room was very still. By and by the little girl said softly, to her mother, "May we not light the Christmas tree, and let him see how beautiful it looks?" "Yes," said the mother. With that she seated the child on a low stool beside the fire, and went herself to fetch the few simple ornaments which from year to year she had saved for her children's Christmas tree. They were soon so busy that they did not notice the room had filled with a strange and brilliant light. They turned and looked at the spot where the little wanderer sat. His ragged clothes had changed to garments white and beautiful; his tangled curls seemed like a halo of golden light about his head; but most glorious of all was his face, which shone with a light so dazzling that they could scarcely look upon it.

In silent wonder they gazed at the child. Their little room seemed to grow larger and larger, until it was as wide as the whole world, the roof of their low house seemed to expand and rise, until it reached to the sky.

With a sweet and gentle smile the wonderful child looked upon them for a moment, and then slowly rose and floated through the air, above the treetops, beyond the church spire, higher even than the clouds themselves, until he appeared to them to be a shining star in the sky above. At last he disappeared from sight. The astonished children turned in hushed awe to their mother, and said in a whisper, "Oh, mother, it was the Christ-Child, was it not?" And the mother answered in a low tone, "Yes."

And it is said, dear children, that each Christmas Eve the little Christ-Child wanders through some town or village, and those who receive him and take him into their homes and hearts have given to them this marvellous vision which is denied to others.

Slummy mummy

2009-11-09T07:26:00.000-08:00

This is what happens when you leave two destructive two year olds and a loose cannon of a four year old to their own devices, whilst you are other wise engaged in blog land.

***Warning anyone who suffers from OCD or is afflicted with the tidy gene may be offended ***

Flower power

2009-11-06T01:05:00.000-08:00

My husband is quite the go getter, not one to rest on his laurels, if he wants something he goes straight after it and he never gives up. His determination and ambition are the qualities i admire most in him and the reason i found him so appealing in the first place. On the other hand I'm the sort of person that tends to go with the flow and i like to procrastinate...A LOT, well they do say opposites attract.

Anyway I'm telling you this because a few months back, i happened to make a flippant comment about how nice it would be to open a florists, something i could direct all my unused creative energy into. Fast forward three months and my husband has just informed me he has secured a lease on a shop that is perfect for my florist idea and we will be opening mid January!!!

"Whooo.. rewind a minute" i say, there's a huge difference in thinking about something and actually making it a reality, yes that difference is my husband, he just acts and thinks later, he may get more done but he has way more headaches in the process.

I know your thinking I'm an ungrateful sod and i should be happy my husband is willing to plough his hard earned cash into a venture purely for me but it's rather perplexing to feel like i have no control in the matter, i feel like stomping my feet and screaming" no you won't tell me what to do." Yet i don't want to cut my nose of to spite my face, it's a fantastic opportunity and a venture I'd love to be at the helm of, i just wish he'd consulted me first.

I should also point out i have NO experience in floristry, i can't tell the difference between a Hyacinth and a hydrangea, and to say I'm not business minded is an understatement. But that's OK because he's "going to hire a qualified florist to show me the ropes and work along side me." So that's alright then!

The top ten tips of how NOT to host a children's party

2009-11-04T11:15:00.000-08:00

This past week i have been run of my feet hosting TWO birthday parties in the space of three days and I've learnt a few tricks of the trade along the way that would have been a little helpful - hindsight is a wonderful thing isn't it?

1) When organising your child's party guest list be sure to actually invest in some invitations rather than rely on asking random mums you meet at playgroups to come along and promising them you will get an invite out to them soon - the next thing you know it's half term and you have no definite attendees for your daughters princess party.

2) Assuming MTV and other music Channel's will take care of the music for pass the parcel, musical statues and other planned party games is a BIG no no. You'll inevitably stumble across advert after advert while the children impatiently tear off all the layers and decide to play with the peppa pig train instead.

3) NEVER invest in £28 worth of pink tulle and declare to your whole family (rather smugly) that you will be hand making 12 tutu's
as presents for the birthday girls friends - the novelty wears off mid way through your third tutu and your left with a pile of useless tulle.

4)Always invest in extra prizes to prevent squabbling over who gets the last glow in the dark necklace or pumpkin glasses - lollipops are not a suitable alternative to any four year old and may result in major tantrums if you have the nerve to offer them.

5) Remember to inform your guests that the party is in fact fancy dress - it always helps i think and saves lots of embarrassment.

6) If you decide to include a pamper station for your little princess's to finish off their look complete with make up and nail polish NEVER EVER leave it unattended, you may find several little girls with nail polish on their eyelids and make up all over your cushions and walls.

7) Overlooking a "from and until" time frame on your Halloween party invitations can have serious consequences when at 3am you are still playing hostess to parents and trying to diffuse a fight that's just broke out on your doorstep between Superman and an inebriated Jack in the box.

8)Do not under any circumstances let your husband erect a huge gazebo for the party costing hundreds of pounds and turn a blind eye when he decides he's too tired to dismantle the thing. It will only end up being blown away by a huge gust of wind on top of your neighbours new conservatory roof - they will not be best pleased!

9) Be sure to place all your child's lovely presents out of reach from little hands - before you know it she, along with the help from several little pals, has opened all her gifts and you can't write thank you cards because you have not got a clue who sent what.

10) Never let your conscience get the better of you and against all your better judgment invite the child from hell down the road he will only wreak havoc causing the little girls to cry and head but the other little boys, whilst his mummy hides behind a goblet of vino trying to blot him out.

Wordless Wednesday -Halloween fest!

2009-11-04T04:03:00.000-08:00

The Twins turn Two today!

2009-11-03T06:03:00.000-08:00

Two years ago today i was in a world of pain giving birth (naturally...please don't judge ;) to my two youngest little girls.

Today, as difficult as they can sometimes be, i couldn't imagine ever not having them in my life. Happy Birthday Eva and Isabella, I'm a very lucky mummy to have such spirited and loving little girls. Have a special day with big cuddles and kisses from your doting older sisters,mummy and daddy x x x x

Back from my blog break

2009-11-02T14:19:00.000-08:00

So how is everyone?? What have i missed??? Probably loads I'm guessing. Hope everyone in blog land is doing fine I'm sorry for my sudden departure but i had no choice in the matter, my laptop just packed up on me. Well that's not technically true as i did play a small part in my hiatus due to the fact it was me who spilt a whole cup of tea over the blooming thing...duh!

It's been one thing after another with the half term getting off to a horrendous start, the girls all caught a tummy bug in quick succession of one another, lasting several days and causing a mountain of bile covered washing. If that wasn't enough to contend with I've been busy hosting two birthday parties in the space of three days, one a Pink princess themed affair and the other a spooky Halloween fest. Unfortunately there is no rest for the wicked as i still have birthday cakes, presents and bonfire night to contend with...being a mum is exhausting at the best of times but early November just kills me!

Today is my beautiful daughter Sofia's fourth birthday, happy birthday princess....

It is also the one year anniversary of my mother-in-laws death. It's been hard but we've just kept ourselves busy and tried to focus on the positives and with the twins turning two tomorrow (yes that's right three birthday's in two days) luckily we haven't had time to dwell on things.

I just want to say Hi to my new followers, if you leave a comment I'll be able to pop over to you and return the favour, and to everyone who has recently left a comment thank you I'm planning on catching up with you all once birthday week is finally over.

Tantrums and Tiara's

2009-10-09T01:17:00.000-07:00

Getting out of bed in a morning has always been a struggle for me I'm more of a night owl and i hate chirpy morning risers they're sooo annoying, unfortunately i happen to be married to one. It's hard enough when you only have to get yourself up, washed, dressed and out the door by an ungodly hour but throw four screaming, defiant little minx's in the mix who like nothing better than pooing all over my kitchen floor, throwing their cereal at each other and spilling tooth paste down their clean, just ironed school uniform it's enough to make you go straight back to bed...if only.

Yesterday morning was an especially bad morning, Wednesdays always are, it's a mad rush to get Mia at the school gates for 8.50am, then Fi at nursery for 9am and make it to the twins playgroup for 9.30am. We managed to all get there in one piece just, but as i dropped Fi of at pre-school looking a little dishevelled i was informed the photographer was at the nursery today.

"OH SHIT" was my first thought as i glanced at Fi's felt tip covered hands from the night before, she even had a smudge of blue ink on her neck. I was told siblings were welcome to come along too after school and as i don't have a proper photo of all four of them together i agreed to come along with a fresh change of clothes later on. I figured it was only 9.30 and i had all day to get the twins looking normal and fish something suitable for the big two out of the explosion that is my ironing pile, i even had time to iron the clothes too so what was the problem?

Never, ever again! I left it until the last minute to search for fresh clean clothes for the girls, that in itself is a huge task in our house as i may have mentioned before I'm not the most domesticated wife on the block. After collecting Mia from school and plying them all with fruit shoots, bribery is a legitimate parenting method you know, we headed over to the nursery for our photo shoot. Now i don't know what i was expecting but to say it was the worst afternoon of my life would be an understatement.

Wrestling all four of them into their semi - clean looking clothes with an audience of aghast parents was bad enough but once they were in front of the lens the E Numbers kicked in and the twins refused to cooperate, instead withering around the white screening and screaming like wild Hyenas. As i tried to control them Sofia decided to wind them up resulting in me telling her off in a hushed stern tone, to which she shouted at me "No mummy No. you don't tell me what to do arghhh".

At this point i was ready to explode with rage and was the colour of a beetroot,Feeling all the other disapproving parent's eyes boring into the back of me i dragged Sofia off the mat and told her we were leaving straight away, she then proceeded to throw herself to the floor and commence a "Let's humiliate mummy some more Tantrum" that went on and on and on. I calmly told the photographer there was no point in continuing and the look of relief and silent sigh in his eyes said it all, we were his worst customers ever, fact and he wanted us out now. I used every strength of my being to stop the tears that were welling up from trickling down my cheeks, i knew if i started i wouldn't stop. Struggling to put Sofia's shoes on, the combination of my shaking hands and her kicking legs didn't help, i wanted the floor to swallow me up and i found myself wondering how on earth I'd ended up such a terrible mother with no control over my children. I felt ashamed of myself and my kids both at the same time and i left with my head looking as far down to the ground as possible and wishing i wasn't so fertile.

If only i had just the one child to devote myself to, spending every day instilling them with manners, morals, love, support, confidence and my undivided attention, hell even two kids would still be doable. But having four in three years has spread me a little thin and although I'm not my own version of the perfect parent i think i do pretty damn good most days, I'd like to see some of the disapproving parents that just had the one child with them take on four and manage any better. As much as i want my children to be Little House on the prairie clones, i realise they are their own person and i can't "control" them however badly i want too, so I've dusted myself down, dried my eyes and vowed to try and stay a little calmer and try my best. No ones perfect right?

Wii Fit Wednesday

2009-10-07T05:54:00.000-07:00

Way back in August i agreed to review the EA sports Active personal trainer, it seemed like the perfect opportunity to fight the fat and battle the bulge, only for one reason or another life sort of kept getting in the way and well honestly i was just too lazy to get of my fat $£!$ and do some exercise!

Well today's the day i start to take action and get fit, I'm commencing the EA Active 30 day challenge, I've finally invested in a sports bra, fixed my wii remote and if that wasn't enough i have even taken my measurements and everything so here goes ...gulp:

Waist: 32inch

Hips: 41inch!!!!!

Left thigh: 23.5 inch

Right thigh: 23inch

upper arms: 11inch

There's no where to hide now, it's all out there in the ether for all to see and I'm hoping that will be the motivation i need to kick start my new fitness regime, I'll be updating you every week with my WII FIT WEDNESDAY posts. Wish me luck, i think I'm going to be needing it......

Good things come to those who wait...

2009-10-03T06:09:00.000-07:00

Today i have accomplished one of my life long dreams, i am now the proud owner of a piano. It's not much to ask for in life, i have always longed to have a piano to call my own, regardless of the fact i can't even play one, and I'm so excited that the fact it's completely out of tune and years old isn't dampening my mood...i love it.

As a kid along with learning a second language and becoming a multi millionairess, one of my ambitions was to someday learn to play the piano, unfortunately my parents couldn't afford the lessons and I'd already blew a small fortune of what little spare cash they did have on pointless singing lessons. My poor mum didn't have the heart to tell it like it is and say no to singing lessons even though i am completely tone deaf, now that's love for you. I can't wait for the girls to have a go at playing our new to us piano and hopefully one out of the four may show a little potential.

It must be my lucky day as not only do i now have a piano to call my own i finally have a car that's my own too. Yes after the catastrophe of our little french trip back in February i have struggled with four kids and no mummy bus, it's been a long hard slog but i can now get back some normality in my life, today really does feel like the fresh start i missed back at the beginning of September when Mia's first day back to school was tarnished by my terrible parenting. Life's looking good right now!

In which i soil myself!

2009-09-29T04:05:00.000-07:00

What a week from HELL i have had! Earlier last week Sofia caught a tummy bug which has lasted intermittently for nearly two weeks now, with several spewing incidents requiring freshly laundered bedding on numerous occasions and lots of dettol. If that wasn't bad enough the twins caught a similar bug which has resulted in explosive nappies of epic proportions and a stench which is just well... wrong.

Now what's worse than three sick kids to look after? I'll tell you what, having to look after said sick kids whilst being at death's door yourself. Yes i caught the tummy bug, which i later found out was suspected Swine flu, my mum and dad have been struck down last week after catching it from my brother and it looks like me and my brood have picked it up too. I haven't felt this ill in a long time and although i didn't suffer from any vomiting lets just say i got caught short a few times when trying to release a little wind form my aching stomach, sorry if that's too much information for you all but shit happens, literally!

Anyway, it appears that i am now over the worst of it and my wonderful mummy came to the rescue yesterday reliving me of the terrible twins till 7pm and Mr Bold took care of the big girls all day leaving me to my sick bed thank god. I really thought that i was on my way out on Sunday, i turned grey and couldn't even muster the energy to sip some water. My bad news doesn't end there though, it seems Mr Bold has now taken a turn for the worse and so our lovely trip to Alton Towers which i won courtesy of the brilliant Laura Driver over at Are we nearly there yet mummy? will have to be cancelled!!!! I have no Luck, this is the second time now i have had to cancel, the first was due to babysitters letting us down and now we're all ill!

There is light at the end of the tunnel however, at least I'll be well enough to attend the British Mummy Bloggers Manchester Meet Up at the MOSI on Sunday, I'm really looking forward to putting some faces to the names and meeting you all in person. Well I'm off to grab a shower as i stink, i haven't had one since THURSDAY...EWW!

That's why Mum DOESN'T go to Iceland!

2009-09-22T06:13:00.001-07:00

OK so I'm feeling a little temperamental of late, my kids are driving me insane and yesterday i had to go for my dread smear which was just awful (I'd put it off for four years so i HAD to go), but what i didn't need was a trip to the ch av capital of supermarkets, I'm visibly shaken now.

There's a reason why Kerry Katona is the face of Iceland and I'm surprised they have revoked her contract given their clientele i have just had a brush with wouldn't bat an eyelid over a bit of drug use! I do apologise if any of you happen to frequent Iceland, I'm speaking purely from my experience at the local store.

This morning i carted all the kids off to nursery for three whole hours of "mummy" time and i had to fit in tidying my germ infested hole of a house along with a bit of grocery shopping. As the nursery is just around the corner form a retail park i made a quick dash around Aldi, see I'm not a snob, i love a bargain and you can't beat their "Super six" offer. After loading all my shopping into the boot i realised i hadn't purchased any quorn mince for tonight's Cottage pie, so as Iceland was on the same retail site i thought I'd pop in to get some. Big mistake, huge...oh my what an eye opener!

They have FOUR freezers dedicated to pizza's alone, which says it all really and only a tiny fridge area with fresh produce. The staff were hardly trained in customer care and most of them were busy gossiping or using their mobile phone! I finally found the quorn mince in the last isle and made a mad dash for the till only for some very rude old guy to grunt and walk straight in front off me, not only that but some greasy haired, overweight smelly twenty year old girl barged right into me from my side and cut in line too!!!! The cheek!!!!

I'm not one for confrontation but i bit my tongue for fear of reprisals, these people have no manners and the last thing i need right now is a black eye. So everyone be warned venture to Iceland at your own peril!

the wife of Bath

2009-09-21T03:49:00.000-07:00

Hot Baths are my favorite thing in the whole world, that and chocolate! Combined i am in heaven and i like nothing better than a red hot steaming bath full of bubbles and sitting in it for hours topping it up with more warm water and reading a good book or just thinking.

Unfortunately this little luxury is a rare occurrence, my house is filled with little people who although are in bed at the time I'm running my bath have the habit of waking up once i put the first drop of bubble bath in and refuse to get back in bed and go to sleep. These days i have to make do with a a quick two minute shower in between dressing my girls and changing mountains of nappies. So imagine how chuffed i was to be sent the latest short Story by Kathy Lette written for the Radox "Be-selfish" campaign, it's completely water proof and is dedicated to ‘all stressed women everywhere’ and encourages women to be selfish and enjoy some “me” time!

All Steamed Up is a comedic take on all those Vesuvial moments in a woman’s life, from pregnancy to the agonies of childbirth, the mind numbing tedium of looking after small children and the chaos of trying to juggle kids and career without dropping anything - to the indifference of busy husbands and finally the ironical heartache of empty nest syndrome. The story finds Katie Love escaping into a bubble bath and talking to the tap as the only way to stay afloat.

So if you want to find out more and bag yourself a copy of the novella click here

Go the Mass has ended.......

2009-09-21T03:10:00.000-07:00

Guess what i spent my Sunday morning doing? you'll never guess? oh alright i suppose the title is a bit of a giveaway, yes i attended Church. I have been meaning to attend our local R.C Church once a month for the best part of three years however life keeps getting in the way and well I'd much rather lounge around in my Pj's and read the Sunday paper....I'm going to hell aren't I?

I have never been particularly religious or a devout Catholic but i have been Baptised, confirmed and attended Catholic schools all my life, so i have the guilt instilled into me and i like some of the old fashioned values too. My life has been lacking a little direction of late as have the kids who's attitude and manners are preposterous at the moment, so i thought now was as good a time as any to seek solace in the Church (it's so much cheaper than therapy) and will put the fear of god in the kids, morals and discipline never hurt anyone right?

I was pleasantly surprised at the turn out and the pews were not just filled with pensioners as i had assumed, no there were lots of families just like mine and lots of kids too, even babies. So i sheepishly asked how i go about getting the girls into Sunday school and was told by a very stern elder that "It's liturgy not Sunday school and Father John will announce it once the mass has begun" oops!!!! I was not making the best first impression ever, but i have to say everyone else was lovely and friendly.

The problem was that i have taken the kids to a local Sunday school sporadically that is protestant and lets just say much more child friendly. I don't know what i was expecting from "liturgy" but it didn't live up to the kids expectations, Mia moaned that "It's not as fun as the village church where we played and sang last time, it's boring". Unfortunately i have to agree with her, it was dismally boring and crammed, not geared to inspire the children to want to keep attending, the lady was enthusiastic and up beat but it was lacking the fun factor and instead of lasting nearly the whole of the mass it was only 15 minutes long, so i was left to sit with two fidgety kids for 50 minutes asking every two minutes "can we go now mummy?"

Mia is not enthused and refuses to attended again next week even with the promise of malteasers after, Fi is willing to give it another go mainly due to the Malteasers. I don't want to have to attend the local village church as Mia is a pupil at the catholic school attached to the church which we were at on Sunday but i don't hold out much hope for our Sunday ritual of family Mass if the Church doesn't up it's game surely a little thinking out side the box is aloud if it means more bums on seats?

Better late than never...

2009-09-17T12:52:00.000-07:00

This week i have been lucky enough to receive two very sought after Awards (ok so i made the "sought after" bit up) but I'm very grateful none the less.

Firstly my bestest blogging buddy Amy at and1moremeansfour has bestowed me the "bloody brilliant" award pictured above and so I'd like to pass this onto four blogs i think are brilliant too (sorry if you already have them):

* Brits in Bosnia

* Kelloggsville

* Time management mum

* yummy mummy flabby tummy

Secondly the very talented Sally over at Who's the mummy and the wonderful Linda who blogs at Gotyourhandsfull have very kindly given me the "Zombie chicken award" which is a lot more flattering than it actually sounds :)

The blogger who receives this award believes in the Tao of the zombie chicken - excellence, grace and persistence in all situations, even in the midst of a zombie apocalypse. These amazing bloggers regularly produce content so remarkable that their readers would brave a raving pack of zombie chickens just to be able to read their inspiring words. As a recipient of this world-renowned award, you now have the task of passing it on to at least 5 other worthy bloggers. Do not risk the wrath of the zombie chickens by choosing unwisely or not choosing at all.

So after much consideration i would like to chose the following five amazing blogs that always bring a smile to my face or a tear to my eye - i am in awe, i think most of you probably have the award already but this just means your twice as fab:

* Maternal Tales

* Not waving but Drowning

* Rebel Mother

* MBNAD Woman

* rosie scribble

Thirdly the new and funky Very bored housewife who is a English mummy living in Spain has generously awarded me the lovely blog award and Widge who blogs all the way over in New Zealand gave me this very pretty award - thanks hun:)

Now I'm sorry to go on and on and on and on.....but I'm not finished yet! I have been a major slacker of late and a terrible blogger, i received a few awards a couple of weeks back that for one reason or another i haven't got round too ( I'm just Lazy). So to show my appreciation and sincere apologies for my rudeness i would like to, instead highlight the lovely bloggers who kindly passed on the awards and ask you all to pay them a visit:

Really Rachel - She is a wealth of knowledge on all things techie and i bow down to her endless techno talents she has so many tips i can't keep up!

Hot cross mum - This blog is very funny, especially her tales of how domestically challenged she is and don't miss the hysterical weekly installments Top of the tots!

Insomniac mummy - Yorkshire lass who is so sleep deprived it's amazing she functions never mind writes a bloody brilliant blog full of amazing posts, puts me to shame.

Four down mum to go - Having the male version of my clan instantly drew me to this fab blog. She has four boys including baby twins and still manages to blog insightful and profound posts all the time - she's great!

chic mama - This Chic is raw and honest, she is busy tackling the huge task of bringing up four kids alone whilst dealing with her troublesome ex husband, and she manages to do so with a great sense of humour - inspiring.

Just to recap that's ten awards I've been hoarding, I'm useless i know, so a big sorry to you all for being such a big slacker and if i didn't pass the awards your way it's probably because you already have them (it's hard to keep track they're everywhere) or I'm seriously tired and still catching up on all that holiday washing, it's nothing personal so please forgive me....phew thank god that's over with it has taken my very tired brain FOREVER!

wordless wednesday: Back from our jolly's and we had a ball!

2009-09-16T04:30:00.000-07:00

Is Anybody out there?

2009-09-08T16:42:00.000-07:00

First of all i would just like to say a HUGE thank you to all those 16 wonderful people who have left such lovely, touching comments on my last post, each and every one has meant so much to me and i really appreciate it. Unfortunately i have just spent the best part of an hour trying and failing to share some bloggy love, i have read every one of your recent posts hoping to leave a comment only for blogger to F*$$ up on me completely. I can't even leave a comment on my own post!!! So i hope you are all reading this "Thank you" and i will be returning the favour once blogger gets it's act together.

So back to my post, i was just about to tell you i spent last night board out of my brains attending an audience with "Lisa Williams" (Famous Psychic) in Blackpool. She wasn't up to much but then again I'm only saying this because i never got a reading, no "Spirits" came through for me and my hubby. Before you all start thinking I'm some loony who loves nothing more than trying to communicate with the dead in my spare time, I'd just like to say it was Mr Bold who purchased the tickets. He has been struggling since the loss of his mum 10 months ago and finds comfort in the thought of the afterlife, something which i do believe exists although i have no desire to ever actually come face to face with a ghost/spirit etc...oh my god just the thought makes me want to hide under my duvet, I'm a major wuss when it comes to anything like this. Anyway his faith has been a little shaken by last night and although i feel extremely sad for him (he desperately wants to believe in all this) i am secretly a little pleased we may not have to sit through back to back episodes of John Edwards every bleeding night!

I have been to see a medium twice now once about a year ago and again a few months back after my mother-in-laws death, and both times the lady has been spookingly accurate. I can't deny there must be something out there but at the same time i fear there are lots of charlatans taking advantage of very vulnerable people, which i find sick yet hardly surprising, it's the same in every walk of life form doctors to accountants! What about you, do you believe in the afterlife?

Well I'm off to bed now as it's very late and my back is aching from all the ironing i have been doing all night long, one more sleep to go and I'll be off to Spain for a few days holiday. I'm getting excited now, i have had my hair chopped off into a neat bob and I've even applied Fake tan.....this time tomorrow I'll be sinking a few sangria yippee! Bye for now and I'll see you all next week :)

I can't go on, i'll go on....

2009-09-07T00:58:00.000-07:00

There has been much strife in the suburbs over the past weekend culminating in an almighty domestic, which has left me wondering if my marriage can withstand the test of time. I can't go into too much detail as it wouldn't be fair to my husband, there are after all two sides to every story and as i still want my marriage to work i don't want people to think bad of him.

Lets just say my husband, for all his wonderful qualities such as being an amazing father to our beautiful children, a loyal friend to me and an excellent provider, has one major flaw - he's very controlling! I on the other hand am rather passive which makes for a quiet sort of life most of the time until i wish to exert a little of my independence. I find myself constantly having to battle with him if i want to have a social life outside our little family unit and in the past it has proved too much hassle and i have given up trying just for an easy life. Now though i can't seem to do that anymore and i am fighting my corner much to the annoyance of my better half.

As the calm descended on Saturday morning i needed to get out, so i took my big girls to the cinema for the second time in a week! This was only their second ever visit and they are becoming seasoned pros at inhaling popcorn, thankfully they will get a new set of teeth in a few years to offset all that sugar :) I had hoped to make the Saturday special, kids can watch an older movie for just £1, but the viewing of Charlotte's Web had already begun so instead of my little trip costing a bargain £3 it came to a whopping £16.80 for three tickets to "Bandslam" and then i had to buy food on top!!!!

the girls were very excited about watching "Gabriella" from High school Musical in the movie but it wasn't exactly what i had imagined and not really suitable for a five and three year old. Bandslam was a cross between Camp Rock and Dawson's Creek (which i happened to LOVE as a teenager) full of teenage angst and social misfits, who are trying to win the coveted prize of a record deal. I stole the title of my post from the name of the band in the film, it seems rather apt. I sat there silently crying into the kids popcorn pondering the fate of my marriage and i seem to have found my mantra for now at least........I can't go on, I'll go on.

Bad Mummy ruins back to school day!

2009-09-02T11:57:00.000-07:00

Today was Mia's first day back at school, she's now in class 2 and i can't believe how quickly her first school year flew by, this was her exactly one year ago to the day, fresh and ready to start her school career...

This time last year she cried all the way to school , sobbing , sniffing and clinging to my limbs refusing to go into that big busy classroom without me. This lasted for 4 whole weeks and i didn't think she would ever settle, that is why today was so momentous for us, she happily strolled from the car to the school gates and before i could give her a good luck kiss she was off playing with all her class mates whom she had missed so much over the holidays and she hardly even glanced at me when the whistle blew for her to line up and enter her new classroom. I should have been pleased as punch, but although i was proud of how far she had come i was also sad that my little girl was growing up so quickly and becoming so independent, not needing me in the way that she had before, i suppose i better toughen up because I'll have to go through it all again next September when Sofia starts big school and before i know it the twins will be needing a uniform too.

As usual i left everything until the last minute and i only purchased Mia's uniform yesterday! I made a mad dash to M&S and got her absolutely everything from underwear to shoes and shirts, i even bought her the most gorgeous school coat ever and this morning when she was all dressed up she looked absolutely amazing in it. Last year i made the mistake of buying all her uniform from the school, only to discover i had paid a fortune for shirts that shrink and cardigans that fade after two wash cycles!

We had a little bit of drama last night when Mia still on holiday mode refused to go to bed, this carried on with me up and down the stairs trying and failing to get her to sleep until it had gone 10pm and i had lost my patience. I stormed up the stairs and gently flung her onto her bed, only for her to bounce back and catch her lip on the side of the bed! I promise i was very gentle and i was completely horrified and guilt ridden, i cried, she cried and i had visions of social services banging down my door!! Me dramatic never, anyway she was absolutely fine this morning, but i wasn't, i didn't get a wink of sleep worrying about her and feeling so guilty, i don't think I'll be winning mother of the year anytime soon, but lesson learned - keep my cool. So after last nights events i have been trying to compensate with lots of ice cream, banana and custard and lots of pink milk, i feel awful, like it has ruined my fresh new start to the school year. This has put me on a downer all day, sitting in the house watching the rain trickling down the windows eating industrial sized packets of biscuits with tea, trying to make myself feel better!

the Best Laid schemes...

2009-08-30T10:57:00.000-07:00

Thursday saw my very first blogging blind date and I'm pleased to report i needn't have been so nervous, for AMY over at and1moremeansfour was lovely and so friendly,
as was her two oldest little Lady's, they are gorgeous and very charming. The time flew by,i felt so at ease with Amy, it was as if we had known each other forever, I'm certain we'll be the bestest of blogging buddies for a long time to come and we already have plans to meet again at the North west meet up being organised over at British Mummy Bloggers. To find out more about our Mummy blind date and what we got up to click here.

Me and Mr Bold had been planning to take the free mini break to Alton towers that i had won courtesy of Andrex over at Laura Drivers Blog are we nearly there yet mummy? on Friday, it was a two night break at a lovely 4* hotel and a two day pass to Alton Towers for us and our two big girls. Unfortunately our Babysitters let us down TWICE and so we have had to re schedule for October, however not wanting to disappoint our very excited little gals we decided to use the free tickets and head for a day out at Alton Towers instead ensuring the weekend wasn't a total wash out for the kids. We set off bright and early Saturday morning with the obligatory stop off at MacDonald's for a breakfast muffin or three and we then headed straight for the M6. After only three minutes into what looked like the start of a very bad traffic jam i had a light bulb moment, instead of queuing in traffic for a few hours to then queue for fair rides for hours why didn't we just head for our local theme park Camelot and pass it off to the kids as THE Alton Towers?

Being the evil genius that i am it worked like a charm, we took the nearest slip road and arrived at our destination in under twenty minutes with the kids chanting "Alton Towers, Aton Towers YEAH!! Mr Bold fell in love with me all over again when he realised he had avoided bumper to bumper traffic. We had a fabulous time, even the terrible weather could not deter us from having fun as we went on numerous twirling rides, log flumes and the Caterpillar roller coaster. We took shelter from the non stop showers to watch a medieval duel with knights on horse back whilst munching on candy floss and ice cream and Mr Bold finished off by squandering the best part of thirty quid trying in vain to win an over grown stuffed animal, we appeased the kids with a toy from the gift shop on our way out of the park and headed straight for the cinema.

Having saved ourselves a few hours of travelling time we decided to take the kids to watch G-Force, the new animation film out that's about Super spying Gerbils i know it sounds a little insane but it was actually quite funny and I'd definitely recommend it if your stuck for something to do tomorrow as it looks set to be ANOTHER very wet Bank holiday! Mia and Sofia loved their first trip to the cinema and with their eyes stuck to the screen they nibbled their way through lots of popcorn, god help us at the dentist on Tuesday. We finished our day trip with a visit to "Frankie and Benny's", which quite Frankie (ha see what i did there) was abysmal never ever get the Spinach and ricotta cannelloni it was nasty!

I'm off now to wash the dishes and put the kids t bed, just in time for me to watch "Wuthering Heights" on Itv, OH the thought of Andrew Lincoln in breaches mmmmm.......Hope you all have a nice bank holiday.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-08-26T02:02:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately being a mummy has led to a drastic change in underwear, gone are the days of expensive pretty wonder bra's and frilly french knickers, instead i have now resigned myself to the fact that i will forever live in spandex!

The Jacob and Esau effect?

2009-08-25T04:58:00.000-07:00

"Which twin was born first?" is something i have often been asked since becoming a mum of multiples and i recently stumbled across a post titled just that over at http://twinparenthood.com/ which has got me thinking, does it actually matter?

Being a mum of two singletons prior to my set of twins has left me in no doubt that the order in which your children are born does affect their own perceptions as to what their role is within the family unit. However it seems absurd to suggest that the same can be said about twins given that only a few minutes not years are all that separates them. There is nothing significant that can take place during such a short amount of time that can seriously influence the individual child's perception of his or her position within the family.

Taking this into consideration the only explanation can be that we as parents and as a society subconsciously impose our own beliefs about the importance of birth order onto the children, thus creating a self fulfilling prophecy. Often i have heard "she is so much bigger than the other twin she must be the oldest" or "you can tell she's the oldest one as she is definitely the boss". I myself am even guilty of falling into this trap, when trying to encourage my twins speech along i immediately concentrated more on Eva's (who is the oldest by 12 minutes)speech as opposed to Isabella's. I wrongly assumed that because Eva was the oldest and most assertive at the time she would be quicker to grasp the concept. I was proved wrong by Isabella almost immediately who started rambling away a whole two months before Eva, i soon learned to stop pigeon holing them.

Birth order definitely creates a competitive streak amongst siblings, my eldest daughter has inevitably take on the role as leader, boss of the playroom and she sees herself as the authority figure amongst all her sisters. My second daughter has become the "naughty little sister" - causing havoc and mischief to get attention, whilst trying to assert herself as her older sisters equal yet at the same time looking to her for guidance in many things like, reading, singing and manipulating mummy and daddy. This for me definitely cements the "middle child syndrome" theory and gives credence to the popular line of thinking that birth order reflects lifelong personality traits.

Having said all this i am still at odds with the notion that this can apply to twins. Eva and Isabella are both as bad as one another, sure they are polar opposites in every way, they are individuals, Eva is the thinker full of mischief and wonderment whilst Belle is the doer the first to crawl, walk talk yet a little clingy too, and they both fall in and out of the role of "the more dominant one". It will be interesting to see how they progress and if in fact the issue of who was the "first born" becomes a part of contention in their relationship as they get older. I do believe though, the fact that they already have two older siblings eliminates a lot of the competitiveness and for some lone sets of twins then an air of importance can be given to the older twin, thus leaving the youngest one feeling a little inferior.

So the next time someone asks "which one was born first?" will you think more carefully about the long term effects your reply can have on your child and their self esteem? Should parents of multiples consider withholding the information of who is the older twin to spare the child's feelings? Or is it irrelevant and unimportant in the grand scheme of things?

**Below is some information about the theory of birth order and it's importance. **

Psychologist Alfred Adler, a contemporary of Sigmund Freud, defined a set of characteristics to describe how a child's position within the family would actualize in his or her personality. Presented below is a simplified version of his theories, adapted from the Adler Institute website.

Adlerian Birth Order Characteristics

Position: Oldest

Family situation: dethroned by next child. Has to learn to share. Parent expectations are usually very high. Often given responsibility and expected to set an example.

Characteristics: May become authoritarian or strict. Feels power is his right. Can become helpful if encouraged

Position: Second

Family situation: Has a pacemaker, always someone ahead. Is more competitive, wants to overtake older child.

Characteristics: May become a rebel or try to outdo everyone. Competition can deteriorate into rivalry

Position: Middle

Family situation: Is "sandwiched" in. May feel squeezed out of a position of privilege and significance. Even-tempered, "take it or leave it" attitude.

Characteristics: May have trouble finding a place or become a fighter of injustice

Position:Youngest

Family situation: Has many mothers and fathers in older children. Never dethroned.

Characteristics: Wants to be bigger than the others. Can stay the "baby." Frequently spoiled

Don't Cry over spilt milk...

2009-08-22T04:39:00.000-07:00

Well whoever said that had not just slipped on some very wet tiles on the way to the wheelie bin with a very large and stinky rubbish bag containing lots of smelly soiled Nappie's ands leftover baked beans and fish fingers! Arrgh i nearly broke my neck, i tell you kids are lethal shaking their milk bottles all over my kitchen floor without a care in the world and pooping for fun - the twins have pooed seven times today. Yes seven firkin times and it's not even tea time yet, oh the joys.

I am starting to despair now, i long to get through the day without hearing shrills of: "mummy wipe my bummmmmmmmm"
"mummy Mia said a swear word"
"mummy Sofia's wet her knickers"
"I'm hungry"
"I want a drink"
"I'm board"
"mummy Eva's took her nappy off and pooed on the floor"
"WHAAAA WHAAA WHAAAAA WHAAA"
"Can i have a biscuit, ice cream, yogurt.....etc,etc"
"Your a mean mummy, i want daddy"
"can i go on cebeebies?"
"I want the craft box NOW"
"Sofia's just smacked me"
"Mummy Mia pushed me over"
"Mummy the babies have poured all the pasta on the floor"
"oh no Sofia's just kicked the baby"
"I don't like you anyway"
"whaaa whaa whhaaa"
"Mummy can we go to the park"
"Mummy she won't let me play"
"It's not fair"
"Mummy I've spilt my juice"
"Mummy Sofia's turned the taps on and waters everywhere"
"Whaa whaaa whaaaa"

All of the above have been screamed at me today and that's just for starters, why oh why did i do this to myself...isn't life just great? Please someone tells me it gets better, because i think I'm losing the will to live!

I am in Love....

2009-08-21T05:54:00.000-07:00

These are my new shoes aren't they lush?

Well i don't actually own them YET but that's just a small technicality, i will be up at the crack of dawn tomorrow to grab me a pair, just in time for my night on the town with the girlie's!
I spotted a pair of the flat version on one of the "yummy mummy's" at play group, and had an instant attack of the green-eyed monster. Whilst i was wearing my tatty 3 year old Next flip flops with half the dominates missing, she was swanning around in Vivienne Westwood getting play dough and squirty foam all over them at messy play, she must have money to burn. I am forsaking a new outfit, i don't get out much so Mr Bold was treating me to a new dress but when i found theses i just had to have them. So I'll be making do with an old outfit and purchasing these gorgeous shoes instead - at least I'll get my money's worth and they won't make my bum look big!

Wordless Wednesday....

2009-08-19T05:16:00.000-07:00

Lazy summer mornings having fun

It's Negative.....

2009-08-18T08:48:00.001-07:00

Yes Today i have taken a pregnancy test! I have been feeling rather sh$*y since Sunday, banging headaches, dizzy, stomach cramps, nausea, every single symptom which would indicate I'm pregnant other than sore boobs. The result is hardly surprising considering i have only just finished my period three days ago and well Mr Bold and I haven't exactly been getting "jiggy" with it of late -huh the chance would be a fine thing. I just wanted to rule out the possibility as i am understandably a little paranoid after having four kids in the space of 3 years and 3months! I opted for the 99p test i found in Home and Bargains as i didn't see the point in wasting money and well they had been shockingly accurate two years ago when i decided to rule out pregnancy on a whim then too!

I have breathed a huge sigh of relief, I'm not sure what i was expecting to feel since the majority of the times i have actually taken a test they're usually positive and i have always been pleased but this one was different. I finally think i am ready to stop pro creating, i didn't feel sad at all which is strange considering i still secretly pine for a SON, and now all that remains for me to do is get Mr Bold to have the dreaded "snip". He has been dodging this one since the twins were born, he too longs for a son one day but i could go on forever popping out girls and i think four is more than enough to be going on with. I love my girls unbelievably and i honestly think another sibling(brother or not) is the LAST thing they need right now, i am torn in enough directions at the moment and they all want a piece of me. I just don't think i could competently divide myself amongst more than four - i struggle now. So as i mourn the son i will never have i count my lucky stars for my four amazingly beautiful, intelligent, healthy funny girls, they are truly all i need and i am enjoying reclaiming a tiny piece of me back that has been lost to motherhood for five whole years - i realise now more than i ever have, it really doesn't last forever - in another five years it will all be over and my girls will be little lady's in the making, now is the time to Basque in the present.

Five Today - Another Happy Birthday Post from a very proud Mummy!

2009-08-16T01:09:00.000-07:00

My Big princess turns a whopping 5 years old today and i can't believe she has survived half a decade with me as her mummy - she rolled off the bed at five months and i nearly had a heart attack; I'd only turned my back for a second to get a nappy, then she nearly fell down a whole flight of stairs at 18months old (silly mummy forgot to lock the stair gate) and at the age of three whilst i was other wised engaged watching the latest episode of Hollyokes her little sister Fifi trapped Mia's Index finger in the playroom door and broke it! I was mortified and felt like the worlds worst mother but so proud of how brave she was at the hospital, especially when after receiving several stickers, lollipops and a certificate she declared to the whole of A&E that when she grows up she wants to become a doctor, i don't think she quite realised the majority of their time is not taken up with appeasing toddlers and handing out stickers and sweets.

All the pain of breastfeeding in those early weeks, when my nipple felt like it had been through a cheese grater, The horrendous sleepless nights and the constant worrying, embarrassing temper tantrums, incessant whining about which vegetables she won't eat, and hitting her sister several times a day because she stole her dolly has all been worth it in the end. She is a beautiful, caring, intelligent constant joy in my life and i am so proud to call her my daughter.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY sweetheart, i hope you enjoy your present sorry it's not the drum kit with lessons that you have asked for but i think for mummy's sanity that is for the best, the noise levels in the house are more than enough to be dealing with at the moment. Enjoy your special day,

All my love and kisses forever,

mummy

Can you Blog with integrity and Review?

2009-08-14T04:49:00.000-07:00

"It's okay to sell your soul if you'll be making enough money to buy it back. -- John Dobbin"

I ask this question as i am in the process of doing my very first review on my blog of the wii EA Sports active Personal Trainer that clareybabble and New Mummy have just done a post about. When i started this blog it was purely to save my own sanity, an outlet in which i could vent the daily frustrations being a housewife and mum of four inevitably bring and to share the highs and lows of motherhood with non - judgemental like minded people in the same boat. That is still my blogs purpose, however along the way i have made some wonderful connections with other "mummy bloggers" which has lead to the opportunity to review a small number of products.

To be honest i initially hesitated, i don't have ads on my blog, and i didn't want to be seen as "selling my soul" and exploiting my children, but the only products i have considered are ones which are completely relevant to my life and which i would probably purchase anyway. I don't intend to make a living out of "reviews" ha the chance would be a fine thing, nor do i have any intentions of swamping my blog with them. I have so far received a package containing Carex products ( which i use anyway) but i haven't got round to reviewing as how the hell do i get excited about hand wash (sorry Carex) but it's true and doesn't mean I'm not grateful for my free travel sized hand gel. The Active trainer as fore mentioned is still lying on top of the fridge, i got a little excited about it's arrival on the first day and tried it out, i lasted 12 minutes into the 30 day challenge and gave up (my legs are still aching though, that's what you get when you do not exercise for five whole years). I do intend to take up the 30 day challenge again once I've invested in a support bra and re programed my remote which the kids have f$**ed up by playing Mario Carts with the little boy next door, but that's on the understanding i can keep the package a little longer - if i had known i would have to send it back i probably wouldn't have bothered!. Not to sound ungrateful or anything but who asks a mum of four destructive pre- schoolers to review something and expect it back in one piece?

Wednesday saw the arrival of my very first "free" toy to review and i am extremely proud to be part of the parent review team over at The Great Toy Guide. Sure I'm not being paid but i am receiving toys for free to keep and all me and my kids have to do is play with them and give an honest review, i mean what more do people want? This has given me a much needed confidence boost not to mention the fact i have made my first contribution to the house in over five years, i know it's only a toy but i feel very proud of my little self and I'm very grateful for the opportunity.

There is a lot of cynicism surrounding the whole "exploitation of bloggers" issue regarding fat cat companies taking advantage of the silly little housewife's who are deemed naive and stupid, and rightly so. Wife In The North's recent post here on the matter makes for some interesting reading and she makes a lot of valid points too, but i feel as long as you are going into the whole thing with your eyes wide open i don't see the harm.

Blogging really has given me a whole new lease of life, and i am happy to take on a few reviews here and there if they are relevant to me and my family, it's not like I'm on the front cover of OK magazine telling the whole of Britain about the last time i had anal sex for god sake ( which for the record was around 9 years ago with my now husband,I'll try anything once and my friend swears by it but it's not for me I'm a traditional girl at heart). I have even made some new friends along the way, one of which i will be meeting in "real life" in two weeks, it will be my first ever mummy blind date and I'm so excited!

So to all those who think i have sold my soul to the devil, it's a free world and you can have your opinion. "You don't get ewt for newt" as my late mother-in-law was fond of saying, and perhaps she had a point, but for now being a SAHM i am happy to take my kicks when i can and life's too short to worry about what others think, as someone much wiser than me once said:
"Try to please everyone and you'll end up pleasing no one."

And remember as my very skinny, groomed and most importantly childless friend says"Up the bum no babies!"..........Now that's where I've been going wrong all these years!

Now that's what i call PANTS!

2009-08-11T06:39:00.000-07:00

Check these out! They are by far the find of the century, amazing, elasticated JEGGINGS. That's right a cross between jeans and leggings. Whilst on my weekly visit to Dots (that's Dorothy Perkins to you) i happened to stumble across these amazing pants and i haven't looked back! They are unbelievably comfy and make you look a size smaller than you actually are. You don't have to worry about lying down and stopping your circulation to try and zip them up either - they fit like a glove. Basically they are maternity jeans without the need for a bump and they even come in black too. Apparently Dots are also selling treggings but I'm not quite sure what the difference is, so go and grab yourself a pair of these wonder pants before they all sell out - I'm telling you they are the future, enjoy!

PMT turns me into Psycho wife

2009-08-09T03:00:00.000-07:00

I got my period today! Now that's monumental as it finally explains my head spinning raging lunatic tendencies and the erratic behaviour I've been displaying over the past twenty four hours. My poor husband has bore the brunt of my extremely unreasonable behaviour, which resulted in me stomping off to bed last night for the SECOND time in an hour, sobbing uncontrollably that i wanted to be "left alone" and this life is just "too much to take, i want some space..on my OWNNNNN".

Oh my i was a little worked up to say the least, the black mist had been descending all day and i spent the most part sulking like a teenager and crying because the random sales call guy on the phone had been a little short with me. The kids didn't help constantly demanding snacks, juice, cuddles, the list is endless and the incessant arguing and fighting over bratz dolls and prams was relentless. Whilst changing Eva's nappy (overflowing with poo) a big Pattie still warm and with a red tinge to it, must have been the spag bol from the previous evening, fell out of said nappy and onto my new flip flops and all over my toes.....NICE! Needless to say i began to weep again, just when you think your day can't get any worse, another pile of shite just lands right on you again, literally.

Now, to be honest, the constant moaning, whining, slaving away, poo splattering incidents are all par for the course in the Bold house and every day occurrences that i usually deal with no problems, but yesterday was not a normal day... i had PMT. Mr Bold gave a sigh of relief this morning when i asked him to nip to Tesco's to get me some nappies and TAMPONS "So that's why you've been so bloody moody then?"

Yep, it pains me to admit this but i happen to turn psycho the day before my periods due, for some reason the past couple of months i have gotten increasingly worse, lets hope next month i find a miraculous cure, failing that i think I'll just hide away in a dark room for two days. Why is it so much more difficult being a woman? I'm telling you I'll be coming back as a man in my next life!

Old McDonald had a farm.....

2009-08-08T04:42:00.000-07:00

Above are the pictures form our trip to Acorn Farm on Wednesday. The kids had a fantastic time and the twins squealed with delight at every single animal they saw.....it was very funny. We fed the pigs, stroked the Bunny's and the little chicks, milked the goats and the big girls even had a ride on the pony's. I was pleasantly surprised at the costs as well, these places are usually a bomb, but the twins were free and children only cost£1 each and Adults £2 - bargain. Bags of feed are 50p and the pony rides are £2 a pop. Being the eternally unorganized fool that i am, i forgot the picnic and so i had to make a trip to the cafe which was also reasonably priced -so a good day had by all, i was exhausted by the end though!

Separated at Birth

2009-08-07T01:47:00.000-07:00

Watching GMTV this morning i was aghast at the shocking similarities the "Hairy Angel" aka Susan Boyle bore to a certain someone. Susan has undergone a major image overhaul in order to appear in US Harper's Bazaar magazine and to be fair, considering what God has given her to work with, the girl looks good and she seems like a genuinely lovely lady too. So why after all that hard work, preening, plucking, pampering and de-tashing does she now resemble Cherie Blair's long lost twin. Don't get me wrong it pains me to say it as i happen to like Cherie, she comes from the same neck of the woods and she seems a nice women, not at all hairy either. Is it just me or were theses two secretly separated at birth?

A bad Hair week meets Lady Luck!

2009-08-05T23:10:00.000-07:00

So if anybody actually reads my very rare Tweets you will know by now that my 3yr old decided to chop of her luscious long golden locks last week whilst i was busy doing the ironing! I was in tears, the four year old was in tears so then the three year old started to blub too....i was devastated. Stupid daddy had left a very large pair of scissors behind the mantel piece after trying to cut his curling disgustingly long toe nails - the dirt bag! He has since been reprimanded and i have now got over the fact Sofia has hair shorter than her dads on the right hand side of her head. I have decided to look on the bright side, she didn't hurt herself thank god and it will, eventually, grow back. She is now left with random one inch tuffs of hair all over her head and i have to put her hair in devils horns (very high bun bunches) to get her looking vaguely normal.

Anyways, the week descended into complete chaos as i had to arrange Mimi's fifth birthday party (her actual birthday is next week but i didn't want all her school friends to forget so we had it a little early) and find some space in the already overcrowded playroom for her new birthday toys. So after a rough ride i am pleased to report my week did in fact get better!

Firstly i have just done my first ever review for the Great Toy Guide, a fabulous new website dedicated to trying out and testing all the latest toys, activities and gadgets for kids form 0-8 yrs old! Please everyone go check it out, it was masterminded by the amazing sally who blogs at Who's the Mummy? so you can be sure you are in for a treat! What are you waiting for go and see for yourself and they are always looking for more honest reviewers too.

Secondly i have received my first ever parcel through the post off the back of this blog from the lovely people at carex - i think they heard about all the poo incidents and wanted to prevent my house from becoming a complete germ infested hole. I have got a few new hand washes, stickers, a great activity pack full of ideas and some travel sized anti bacterial gel -no washing required, which will come in very handy for my..........

Free trip to Alton Towers at the 4* Best Western hotel! Yes Thanks to the fantastic Laura Driver at are we nearly there yet mummy? me and Mr Bold get to take our big girls on a free weekend away! I am soo thrilled as i never win anything, and also we were planning a weekend away at Haven in the next few week but now we don't have too. Caravan or 4*hotel hmmm that's a tough call? I think we'll make do with the hotel now ha.

Finally sorry to anyone who has left a comment on my blog recently, I've been swamped with mummy duties and have neglected my little blog, but i plan to reply to all your comments very soon as they are very much appreciated. I'm off now to clean bums and make a picnic for our day out at Acorn Farm....can't wait, honest!

Build a bear Bankruptcy..

2009-07-29T11:14:00.000-07:00

Today me and Mr Bold took the girls for a treat to the trafford centre, since all the free options like feeding the ducks and going to the park have been exhausted and also the weather was not permitting to out door activities. After lunch at TGI Friday's, which was very yummy by the way, we took the girls to build a bear.

O.M.G. Have you seen the extortionate prices they are charging for basically baby clothes you could buy for a few quid in Ethel Austins,i mean £3.50 for a pair of cotton knickers for a bear? I don't think so! The kids were in their element and i let them pick an outfit and shoes for each of their bears at home. Mia chose the Hannah Montana outfit and Fi wanted the princess fairy outfit with ballet pumps to match. The spending didn't stop there though as they also wanted matching backpack baby carrier thinys and matching sunglasses and handbags for their bears, i buckled i had no reserve left and just wanted some piece and quiet. The poor twins didn't get a look in....god help me when all four are asking for outfits, accessories and Bears to boot I'll be bloody destitute. So for all you parents out there who are lucky enough to be oblivious to the whole build a bear phenomenon...do not do it, don't even go there......believe me your bank balance will thank you for it!

Lovely sisters..

2009-07-28T02:50:00.000-07:00

These lovely pictures show how two sisters are enjoying their first whole week playing together, not sure how long it will last, but at least i have photo's to prove they do actually like each other! I think I'll be needing these by the end of the six weeks when they are both tearing each others hair out and ripping limbs of each other's barbie dolls!!!

Not another MEME

2009-07-27T06:48:00.000-07:00

Yes I'm sorry but the lovely Amy and clareybabble have tagged me in the blame Tara meme that's doing the rounds, and i just couldn't refuse such lovely Lady's and well i love nothing more than talking about moi ha ha.

1) Who is the hottest movie star?
I would have to say Matt Damon in the Bourne trilogies he has pecs to die for and Andrew Lincoln, i know he's not really a movie star but he was in the movie LOVE ACTUALLY!

2) Apart from your house and car, what's the most expensive item you've ever bought?
My wedding dress, even though i have now gone off it completely and it is lying gathering dust in my attic.

3) What's your most treasured memory?
Ohh i have so many but i suppose the birth of my children and my wedding day top them all.

4) What was the best gift you received as a child?
Madonna's immaculate collection LP and a brand new Hi Fi system to play it on....i danced for hours to "like a virgin" and "borderline."

5) What is the biggest mistake you've ever made?
Not completing my university degree, i took a gap year and never went back much to the disappointment of my parents.

6) Four words that describe you?
Messy, Caring, daydreamer and chocoholic

7) What was your highlight and lowlight of 2008?
My highlight was seeing my big girl Mia start school in her new crisp uniform with matching ribbons in her hair, she looked amazing and i was so proud of her. My lowlight was the death of my mother in law which happened on Fi's 3rd birthday.

8) Favorite film?Pretty woman and dirty dancing - i know I'm such a girl!

9) Tell me one thing i don't know about you?
I suffered a panic attack yesterday....i used to suffer from them as a teenager and now they have come back to haunt me when i least expect it...they're just awful and i feel like I'm going to die.

10) If you were a comic book/cartoon character who would you be?I'd love to be Jessica Rabbit...those curves and eyelashes are unreal!!!

So now to pass this meme on to 7 deserving blogs, well almost all the blogs i read have already been tagged so forgive me if i have missed anyone out it is completely unintentional and feel free to play along! The seven blogs i pass this onto areas follows and please will you all go and check them out as i think they are fab:

The Dotterel

moaning mum

lost in translation

The private diary of a chic mum of four

Hot cross mum

Selina Kingston is forty

Some mothers do ave em

C'est Catastrophe

2009-07-23T15:30:00.000-07:00

As promised i am about to regale you with the tale of our epic adventure across France, those who scare easily should avert their eyes now...it doesn't end well, hence the title.

So back in February it was half term and Mr Bold had a light bulb moment that we should up sticks and move to France for a better quality of life for both us and the kids. I being somewhat passive and in need of change ANY change in my humdrum life, decided to go along for the ride. I mean who doesn't love a bit of Merlot and brie, i have a penchant for garlic flavoured anything and what better gift for the kids than a second language.....yes you see i had really given this monumental step some serious thought.

We googled a few small towns and found some quaint pretty hamlets within close proximity to a few airports that the budget airlines frequented, and within the space of two weeks we had arranged to view no less than eight houses/barns. So with all the viewings arranged and a lovely little gite for us to spend the week in all that we needed to do was book the flights. Simple enough right? Wrong, so wrong. I, yes I take full responsibility, at the last minute suggested it may be a lot less hassle and much cheaper if we were to drive instead. It solved the problem of car rental and child car seats that was such a pain on our last holiday in Spain, and well it sounded like such a family adventure not to mention the ease of just popping the luggage in the boot and unloading right outside our gite door.

The nightmare began thirty minutes into our journey to Dover, i somehow overlooked the fact that Fi suffers form terrible travel sickness and just as we were batting down the M6 she spewed everywhere followed by Belle who we have since learnt is also afflicted with the travel sickness gene. Unfortunately Belle was too far back in our seven seater mum bus for me to reach and so she stayed sat covered in sick for over an hour until we reached Dover as we didn't have a minute to spare if we were to make the ferry in time. The smell was putrid and although belle was sick only once Fi carried on approximately 16 times in our 12 hour car ride and went through no less than TEN plastic bags!

We stupidly assumed that the worst was out the way, we invested in some travel sickness pills and a few packets of ginger nuts and began to settle into our beautiful but freezing Gite. The next morning when one of our tyres blew out
on route to our first viewing,we should have realised that La vie en Rose was just not meant to be for us, but still we soldiered on and after nearly two hours struggling to fit the spare tyre and investing in a Majorly expensive replacement we all had a rather jolly time. The french way of life looked to be just what we needed, a slower pace of life and taking time to stop and smell the roses seemed to be within our grasps. The kids had a wonderful relaxing time playing in the open fields and crunching all the leaves and on our penultimate day we found our "dream" home, well Mr Bold did, i preferred the larger, more expensive, already renovated to within an inch of it's life barn we had seen the day before but what did i know and with a gentle nudge in his way of thinking i was on board planning the barn renovations and A chicken coupe.

We had such a great time that on our last day it was decided we should drive to Paris via "Disneyland" and extend our stay for the night. This was where it all started to go down hill, the Disney hotel wanted just short of $600 Euros for one evening and that did not include entry to the park, so we drove around some more until we found a much more reasonably priced establishment which had it's own children's play area, ball pool and gift shop and was not to shabby for the Bolds. On awaking we were met by the drizzling sound of rain tapping on our windows, the first drop we had seen all week, and so we decided to just head for the Disney village and treat the girls to a toy instead of blowing $200 for two hours as we needed to leave sharpish to catch the ferry home.

Mia picked a lovely princess tea set and Sofia settled on a Minnie mouse backpack, the twins were happy with a stuffed teddy each. So with the kids sorted and none the wiser, (poor mites thought that they were actually in Disneyland )we had told them Micky and Minnie did not like the rain, we all had a lovely lunch and set off on our journey home. About eighty miles away from Calais we made our last toilet stop, only there were no toilets just open space and Fi decided she needed a number two......argh. Back on the road and only five minutes later the car, in the fast lane doing eighty miles an hour, decided to conk out!!!!

After veering over to the hard shoulder and escaping death by a whisker, we proceeded to try to alert the attention of passers by, in vain, for over an hour. Eventually Mr Bold Found one of those emergency phone thingy mybobs and another thirty minutes later the most ignorantly rude french man ever came to our rescue and towed us to the safety of a VERY remote town. I know what your thinking why didn't you have breakdown cover? Why didn't you have your mobile phone???

Firstly Mr Bolds mobile died about thirty minutes prior to the breakdown and mine was never ever charged, it was lying dead at the bottom of my handbag where it had resided all week. Secondly we have UK cover but had somehow made a HUGE oversight and forgotten European break down cover....believe me you only ever make that mistake once, we have certainly lived and learned...c'est la vie.

You would think that was where our bad luck would end, oh no that was just a prelude. The company that towed us to safety could not fix the car so we had no choice but to stump up some cash to pay said nasty french man for his troubles and leave all our possessions bar essentials to head on foot with four kids for the bus station! Humbling to say the least. We did not have a double buggy as we had hired one from the Gite to save car space, so we waited over an hour, with four very tired and hungry children for the peasant wagon to transport us to a town that actually had a train station. Once we arrived we waited another fifty minutes standing in line for our tickets. After much deliberation we decided the best thing to do was head for Dover rather than take the euro star. After two train changes and a taxi ride we finally arrived in Calais just in time to board the last ferry accepting foot passengers. The poor kids were absolute angels and we tried our best to convince them it was all a big adventure, us adults on the other hand were hoping to catch a break for Christ sake. Finally on board the ferry the kids got some much need food and with the help of some very lovely and kind staff we desperately tried to arrange some sort of transport home form Dover. As we live in Merseyside we had quite a long journey ahead and finally managed to arrange for one of the staffs neighbours , whom was a taxi driver working nearby, to take us to Oxford services for £250. We waited for the taxi for over forty minutes and once at oxford services My father in law was waiting to drive us the remaining three hours home!! We arrived in our house at 5:30 am after what was one of the most stressful days of my life........NEVER EVER again will i suggest driving anywhere abroad, easy jet all the way.

To add insult to serious injury, we now faced the torrid task of getting our poor broken car home so after twenty four hours rest Mr Bold and his dad embarked on a repeat journey to Dover to catch another ferry and bring our car full of dirty laundry home. All did not go smoothly, Mr Bold had borrowed a towing dolly from a friend, which snapped after he'd spent two whole hours trying to attach it. He then had to think outside the box and use some rope to tow the car instead but with only forty miles left to Calais the french police flagged them down and ordered them off the motorway and down a country lane. This resulted in my father-in-law panicking and going straight into the back of my now completely wrote off mummy bus! SO Mr Bold arrived home Twenty five hours after he had left, empty handed and with the task of getting our car back onto British soil still ahead. We finally admitted defeat and hired a firm to collect our car which arrived two days later costing £700 and in need off a complete overhaul which was an absolute fortune!!! NEVER AGAIN!!!!!!

Weepy Wednesday

2009-07-22T14:17:00.000-07:00

Gossip Girl is over...weep, School is out for summer....triple weep and i have no chocolate left in the house for a bedtime treat....WEEP! So i thought i would cheer myself up with saying a big THANK YOU to my lovely blogging mum chums for thinking of me and Awarding me with a MEMEME award. Cheers Muddling along mummy, Caution....woman at work and baby baby for kindly giving me a reason to rest my ickle brain and just follow orders.

The rules are i must list 7 personality traits:

1)INDECISIVE - I am incapable of making any sort of decisions even simple inconsequential ones like what sandwiches to make for Mia's packed lunch.

2)STUBBORN - Yes i will always cut my nose of to spite my face, must be a taurean thing

3)LOYAL - I will always stand by a friend no matter what!

4)FRIENDLY - Even when people aren't that nice to me i can't help myself, i love to chatter and i can't stand awkward silences.

5)DISORGANISED - My life and home is complete chaos. I never put the laundry away, am always late for everything and can never find my car keys or important paperwork.

6)PASSIVE - I hate confrontation and let most people make the decisions for me out of fear of "rocking the boat", anything for a quiet life.....yet it still alludes me!

7) HONEST - I am a terrible liar it's just not in my nature and even little white lies i cannot get away with. So this one's kind of a double edged sword. I cannot abide liars though and as Sophocles once said "a lie never lives to be old."

So i now i have to pass this onto 7 other deserving blogs but my bed is calling so i will post those tomorrow.......... night night everyone x

Happy Anniversary!

2009-07-20T16:16:00.000-07:00

"Those who in July do wed must labour for their daily bread"

Today i am celebrating three years of wedded bliss and sometimes Hell. Yes three years ago today we declared to forsake all other and be Husband and Wife forever till death us do part....yikes put like that it's a wonder we've even made it so far. Having reached the seven year itch mark in our relationship we decided with sheer defiance to get married instead of itching the proverbial scratch.

The wedding took place in Florida at the beautiful celebration golf course, with a select number of close family and friends. The weather was glorious and in the end it turned out to be a lovely day, although me being the queen of drama it did not go without a hitch or ten. Firstly the hairdresser was hopeless and after three failed attempts at getting my hair right i had to settle for an awful up do that did me absolutely no favours, a few tears were shed but i got over it until me and my Mother in law were left stranded at the hairdressers by a taxi firm.

Fortunately my guardian angel was looking out for me that day and with the help of a complete stranger who worked at the local Wal-Mart i arrived back to the villa with only eight minutes to spare. I had to get my dress and make up on and have pictures taken in under ten minutes but we all made it in the end.

After our Al fresco ceremony we headed straight back to the luxury rented Villa and consummated our marriage in under five minutes while waiting for our guests to arrive, we then spent the rest of the afternoon splashing in the pool. In the evening we all went for a lovely slap up meal and then spent the remaining week of our holiday traipsing around various Disney parks in horrendous heat. All is well that ends well.......i think.

Leather Anniversary?

2009-07-19T23:00:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow marks mine and Mr Bolds third year of marriage together and what better way to celebrate our little mile stone than with the gift of LEATHER. Yes apparently leather is what is traditionally received as a present on your third anniversary, but unless you are some weirdo into S&m and gimp masks (which for the record i most certainly am not), then i can't see how this gift is supposed to enhance or cement your marriage. I'm struggling to come up with any type of gift other than maybe a wallet?

Below is a year - by - year list of the traditional anniversary gifts:

First: paper

Second: cotton

Third: leather

Fourth: linen

Fifth: wood

Sixth: iron

Seventh: copper

Eighth: bronze

Ninth: pottery

Tenth: tin or aluminium

Eleventh: steel

Twelfth: silk

Thirteenth: lace

Fourteenth: ivory

Fifteenth: crystal

Twentieth: china

Twenty-fifth: silver

Thirtieth: pearls

Thirty-fifth: coral or jade

Fortieth: rubies

Forty-fifth: sapphires

Fiftieth: gold

Fifty-fifth: emeralds

Sixtieth: diamonds

How lame are some of theses ideas and to think i have to ride it out for at least thirty years if i want any sort of "decent" present, I'm hoping i have the stamina to see in my fifty fifth wedding aniversary as Emeralds are the only appealing gift on there. No wonder so many marriages end in divorce.........TIN for a decade of compromise and slanging matches i don't think so!!!!

When it's all just poo much.....

2009-07-17T04:59:00.000-07:00

Poo seems to have taken over my life, not only do i have to wipe 3 yr olds bum after every toilet trip(she's surprisingly capable at nursery though), check to see if there is any trace of poo left on four year olds botty after her number 2s as she likes to be doubly sure, i also have to clean up little treats left for me all over my floors (the twins like to surprise me by ripping off their nappy All the time)!

All this and i still am greeted by the stench of stale turds every morning courtesy of Eva's new party trick and no amount of masking tape can deter her. So when Mia "accidentally" stood in dog poo right outside her school gates yesterday on our way home, it was the last straw! I was furious at the skanky dog owner who let their mutt shit of all places outside a primary school and didn't pick it up, i mean how inconsiderate and down right disgusting is that?

So Mr bold had the pleasurable job of cleaning Mia's school shoes - i draw the line at human poo and only baby poo at that! With all this in mind i am contemplating commencing "operation potty training" with the twins - i know i must be certifiable, but i had intended to make use of the summer holidays and all that glorious sunshine (yeah right) to try and get them into some pretty knickers, I'm just not sure i am mentally strong enough to keep it up as there are TWO of them and I'm only used to doing one at any given time! If anyone has any advise on how to potty train multiples i would be very grateful.

Damsel in distress

2009-07-13T06:11:00.000-07:00

Did you think I'd fallen off the edge of blogshere? Probably not as i don't think anybody would have actually noticed...weep, well i on the other hand have felt like my right arm has been sworn off, it's scary how addicted i have become to blogging in such a short amount of time - how did i ever live without it!

Nothing much has changed in the bold house I'm sorry to say, yes i still awake to poo smeared in Eva's cot most mornings in spite of the masking tape i have resorted to using in the hope she may not be able to rip it off and the house is still a tip, however all that is about to change now i have joined Flylady.

You all will have probably heard of the wondrous and annoyingly organised Flylady, she sends you daily emails and tips on how to tackle your cluttered home and become a proper housewife with a gleaming home starting with a shiny sink! I have tried this once before pre twins but failed miserably...so hears hoping second times the charm.

Organisation skills are something i am seriously lacking and today was no exception, even with flyladys help i managed to be late for the school run AGAIN only this morning to add to my many stresses it was Mia's end of year assembly and i was already five minutes behind my extreamly tight schedule when i spotted a toad in my car next to the seat belt i was about to fasten. Yes a big slimy fat green toad - i froze with fear and even the thought of missing Mia singing twinkle twinkle in Spanish was not enough for me to overcome my irrational behaviour and flick the toad out. Eventually and after a rather pathetically frantic call to Mr Bold, who just sighed and told me to deal with it, a knight in shining armour appeared from nowhere to save the day. My prince charming was fifty something, stumpy, balding with yellow teeth (at least they were his own) and was walking a German Shepard not riding a powerful white horse....... but this damsel in distress was grateful anyways and beggars can't be choosers. Who said chivalry was dead eh?

They love me, they really love me....

2009-07-06T12:27:00.000-07:00

I have finally been awarded the "F**$ing fabulous" blog award and i am mega thrilled!!! I know it's rather juvenile to take delight in the use of obscene language but hey it's my blog and I'll effin swear if i want too he he. Thanks to the very witty "maternal tales" for bestowing such a wondrous accolade upon me, i do apologise if i am rambling a Little too much but i have polished off a whole bottle of rose and am struggling to type through the hiccups ha.

The wine is in aid of self medication as i have had the day from hell yet again with the terrible twins .....they have not stopped screaming and I'm at my wits end, I'm hitting the bottle in the hope of numbing the pain and deafening the constant ringing in my ears from their high pitched incessant cry. I have awoken to poo nearly every day for the past ten days in a row i kid not. I am not talking metaphorically i mean literally poo!!! Eva for some strange sadistic reason is taking great pleasure in ripping her nappy off at the crack of dawn and shitting all over her cot, some times she is kind enough to not stand in it and walk it in to the ma tress...but 8 times out of ten i find her smearing it everywhere with her feet!!!! Anyway I'm digressing sorry...

So back to my award, yeah me!! Now as i am slightly intoxicated i cannot recall what i am supposed to do with it so i will kindly pass it on to five "F$**ing Fabulous" Blogs that i love to read, if i am not following the correct protocol i do apologise but hey I've had a few bowls of loud mouth soup what the hell do ya expect. So here are my chosen five in no particular order..............

Metroplitan mum

Dancingfairy

Domestically challenged

A Modern Mother

My guide to surviving and enjoying life's mundane

Well I'm off now to try and post a comment on my chosen five's blogs, however my computer or the virus is still not fixed so i may need to email them all.....

THE interview - my girls on their mummy

2009-07-02T05:00:00.000-07:00

After reading the lovely Susanna's blog recently i stumbled across a post in which she had interviewed her children, asking random questions all about her (their mum), the answers are so cute that i have decided to follow suit with my very own interview. Here's how it went.......

1) What is something mum always says to you?
Mi - "STOP!" and "ooh no"
Fi - "Don't hit the babies"

2) What Makes mummy happy?
Mi - "giving you kisses and when Daddy gives you flowers"
Fi - "When we bring you flowers from Nanny's"

3) What makes mummy sad?
Mi - "When we smack you and when we are naughty at someones house"
Fi - "When we be naughty"

4) How does mummy make you laugh?
Mi - "When she tickles me"
Fi - "When you pull funny faces"

5) What was your mummy like as a little girl?
Mi - " Was you nice to uncle A and auntie S? (no comment ...cough)
Fi - "You ate chocolate balls" (really????)

6) How old is your mummy?
Mi - "Are you 100?"
Fi - "seventeen"

7) How tall is your mummy?
Mi - "ten feet tall"
Fi - "Longer than auntie S"

8) What is her favourite thing to do?
Mi - "clean" (does she not know me at ALL?)
Fi - "Work for jobs" (???)

9) What does your mum do when your not around?
Mi - " I think you feel a little bit happy"
Fi - "You bake my dinner"

10) If your mummy became famous what would it be for?
Mi - "Fashion - you would be on Gok"
Fi - " You would dance in X factor" (i don't think soooo)

11) What is your mum really good at?
Mi - "Tidying up"
Fi - "Printing out the tweenies papers on the computer for me to colour"

12) What is your mummy not very good at?Mi - "Dancing" (True, very true)
Fi - "Baking pizza cos you burnd it" (Spot on)

13) What does your mummy do for her job?
Mi - "look after her children"
Fi - "She goes to shopping"

14) What is your mummy favourite food?
Mi - "salad because it's in the fridge" (Yeah it's the only thing that's ever in the fridge because i NEVER eat it, i just buy it to make me feel better about all those chocolate purchases)
Fi - " 'biscetti' bolognaise with mushrooms in it"

15) If your mummy could have one wish what would it be?
Mi - "A bike"
Fi - " on a shooting star for a Hannah Montana book (wtf?)

P.S Just to let you all know i am having major problemos with my stupid computer, which is allowing me to write posts but not comment on mine or any other blogs arrgh. Please don't think I'm being ignorant i appreciate all your comments and will be returning the favour as soon as this laptop is fixed...fingers crossed it's soon!

The perils of letting your kids watch too much reality TV

2009-06-29T22:29:00.000-07:00

Ok i know they shouldn't be watching to much telly let alone trashy TV but what can i say i love trash. It is always a highlight in our house when dancing on ice, X Factor or my girls fave strictly come dancing is on the box on a Saturday night, we all cram onto one sofa and cuddle up with treats waiting to be entertained.

Lately though it has come to my attention that our family bonding time might have as many cons as there are pros, i recently wrote a post about the unsavory influence the Disney channel was holding over my big girls here, but this is much worse.

For example, last week while i was channel surfing i happened to stumble across this years series of Big Brother (purely by accident of course), and within seconds Mimi was asking where Lisa and Mario where - yes those loser gym buffs form last years show, oh no i though I've brainwashed my child - last year she was only three for Christ sakes. Then last nights little performance from Fi finally put the nail in the coffin of my watching any reality TV before the watershed. She was in the garden dancing away, giving us all a rendition of John Denver's "country roads" (very cute by the way), when seemingly out of nowhere she took to the table top and started to wiggle her belly then wait for it.......she put her finger in her belly button shot us a mischievous smile and proceeded to put said finger into her mouth! I actually spat my tea out, I'm just thankful no one but her unconditional loving parents witnessed it. We later realised she was impersonating Britains got talents belly dancing tyranny dad - i don't think I'll be winning mother of the year any time soon.

For those of you who haven't a clue who I'm talking about above is a pic of Mama Trish before his awful performance.

Sliding doors

2009-06-29T08:49:00.000-07:00

Have you ever seen the film with Gwyneth and that sexy Scots man, then you'll know exactly what I'm talking about, the moment in your life when you could have gone one way or another changing your destiny forever. Do you ever wonder if your on the right path?

I often feel like my life is just an interim and somewhere out there my 18 year old self is just waiting for me to come back and finally pick up where i left off. I can't seem to rationalise my reality with the imaginative one i had planned for my self all those moons ago (well seen as I'm only 26 not that many moons have elapsed but it sure feels like it). What if my younger self could see me now she would pity me for sure, probably swear to herself she would never end up like me, no she wanted to live her life completely, she was so certain of where she was going and what she was going to accomplish. So why do i now find myself married with 4 kids living a safe comfortable predictable existence? Children were definitely not on my agenda, but being so young i suppose that's a given, marriage well that never held any allure either given that my parents marriage was such a disaster (i should add they are still together, mainly due to the many compromises my mother made). Yet here i am, this is my life, and i am defined by being a wife and a mother of 4 and maybe that there in lies the problem. Its not my life I'm dissatisfied with just the definition of it. I am no longer that same tunnelled visioned 18 year old but i know how she and other people who are also of the same mind would perceive me. I do not want to be viewed that way, the way in which i see the world has changed it is no longer simply black and white, there are shades of grey emerging that i could not see before. Maybe I'm just judging myself through my old eyes not my new ones does that make any sense??

Maybe this was always how my life was supposed to turn out, karma, destiny whatever you call it or maybe i just took a wrong turn, i'm not sure anymore.

Kids say the funniest things...not! Recycled

2009-06-27T09:14:00.000-07:00

My recycling challenge is dead in the water, i never really got started so as i am hopeless at this recycling malarkey i thought i would follow in Emily's footsteps over at maternal tales by recycling one of my old posts - i don't think anyone has actually read it.................

Last night i made a rare escape from the mad house and went to see "the boat that rocked" at the pics with one of my mummy friends(trips to the pub to get pissed are usually reserved for my childless friends who still vaguely remember me pre- kids and therefore don't look at me with disgust when i drunkenly fall over and cut my knee open). The film was surprisingly funny, but to be honest I'd have watched paint dry if it meant eating popcorn and ice cream in peace.

Arriving at my friends house to pick her up i noted to her daughter, who's the same age as Mimi, that the pizza she was prodding around her plate at the dinning table was in fact one of Mimi's favorite dishes to which she replied:

"I don't like pizza, and john doesn't either mummy does he?

"Yes you do like pizza, and john does too now eat your dinner or there's no desert" my friend shot back.

"But mummy john doesn't like pizza, remember when he threw it at my head".

my friend calmly replied "now you know we don't mention that in front of other people sweetie, and he didn't throw the pizza at you he was aiming for mummy and missed."

LOL!!!!!!!!!! I nearly wet myself which isn't that difficult considering the state of my bladder control after pushing out 4 sprogs, but seriously the horror on my poor friends face was priceless and as she quickly began to regale me with details of how "pizza gate" unfolded(a standard domestic which resulted in her partner of 3yrs flinging pizza at her and missing) it took me back to when my 4 year old dropped me well and truly in the shit!

Just before Christmas we asked my sister if she could do a spot of RARE babysitting and when i say rare i mean rare - i can't remember the last time she looked after them for me. Now i have to add me and my husband were not doing a spot of Christmas shopping or catching up on some much needed "couple" time how i wish my life were that indulgent, no we were off for 1 hr to meet with a vicar and arrange my amazing mother-in-laws funeral(who had passed away suddenly 5 days earlier). My poor husband who was and still is devastated and in complete shock was understandably reluctant to meet with the vicar and wanted nothing to do with the funeral arrangements (luckily i eventually persuaded him he'd regret it if he didn't) wanted to get it over with as quickly as possible and so wasn't impressed when my sister telephoned (15 minutes after we needed to leave) to say she was on her way and would be another 10 minutes late due to the fact she had got held up talking to friends whilst shopping!!!!
I can't remember exactly what was said but lets just say my husband wasn't happy when i reported my sister would be another 10 minutes late and so my children were privy to some rather colourful language. Once sis had arrived seemingly unaware as to the distress she had caused and without an explanation as to why on such a difficult day she was late and very unapologetic, we left to meet the vicar only to find we'd missed out on all the decision making, the hymns, readings etc had already been chosen by the rest of my husbands family.

On our return home some 40 minutes later, my husband inconsolable with grief had completely forgotten about my sisters inconsiderate tardiness as had i, we were met by my brother who had been summoned without explanation to take over babysitting duties as my sister had to leave right away. I asked Mimi if she had any idea as to why auntie S had to go and she said:

"She was upset when i told her that daddy said she was a "fucking fat bitch", and that mummy said "well don't worry i won't be asking her again".

O.MY.GOD!

Yes my four year old had well and truly dropped me and hubby in it, i was mortified as was my husband who had meant absolutely no malice by it, it was a slip of the tongue during what was the most difficult time of his life and was supposed to be for the confines of our own home and never to be repeated. Yes the beauty of having kids is that you can never be sure if anything you say or do whilst in their presence (intended or not) will remain private.

My Husband wanted to call and apologise straight away but i assured him she would understand when she had calmed down that he did not intend to hurt her feelings as it was a private conversation, and anyway he had a lot on his plate without worrying himself about this. I later apologised to my sister after the funeral was out of the way, we had more pressing issues to deal with at the time and were struggling just to get through the days but to my astonishment she did not accept my apology gracefully. She was still extremely angry and could not believe we had the audacity to complain that she was late when she was doing us the favor (i can't wait till she has kids) and "So what if i was five minutes late" she retorted (actually more like twenty five minutes late and considering the circumstances it was a big deal, i mean how often does your husband have to arrange his mums funeral? Anyway relations are getting better now, things aren't as frosty anymore and once Christmas was out of the way we were on speaking terms again although I'm not sure things will ever be back to normal completely - kids eh?

It's not about the winning.....

2009-06-26T11:50:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was Mimi's first ever sports day, she was very excited and looked quite the part, me and Mr Bold were very proud even when she came in ...LAST! He he i had to laugh a little as her daddy was (still is) immensely competitive and i think it must have secretly killed him to looked pleased as she tottered over the finish line behind ALL the other girls, bless her.

Now i am not going to take full responsibility for her incredible lack of sporting ability, admittedly i cannot even hit a shuttle cock and was always picked last for team games, but i did come 3RD in the girls race at fourth year high school I'll have you all know! Mr Bold relishes winning every single thing, he's a very sore loser and is annoyingly good at EVERY sport. I once introduced him to snowboarding on my gap year, i was secretly pleased i had masted something he couldn't do, my pleasure lasted all of 24 hours, by which time he had the art of "edging" down to a T and had left me for dust on the blue runs...cocky git! I don't envy Mi having to put up with his competitive streak and am a little thankful she's out of the running for now, but if any of the other girls happen to show any athletic prowess, god help them, he'll be on them like a flash.

It seems Mi is not the only loser in the Bold house, i am only in day three of my recycling challenge and already I've hit a brick wall, it was chicken pie with green beans and baby potatoes for dinner last night and lets just say it is not the most aesthetically pleasing meal to be met with the day after. I was supposed to eat the leftovers for lunch, i did contemplate giving it to the tank twins (they will eat ANYTHING), but i feared even the they would not have the stomach for it. It resembled dog food, I'm ashamed to say i scrapped the offending mess straight into the bin quicker than you can say "pizza everyone"!

A letter to my mother-in-law

2009-06-24T14:10:00.000-07:00

Well it has been nearly eight whole months now since i have last seen your warm smile, Heard you belly laugh at the kids playing, sing silly old nursery songs that i had never heard to the girls, listened to you banter with E(Mr Bold)about him never getting round to finishing those chores he always promised to do, moaned at you to stop puffing on those awful ciggies that stunk your house out, and sat in comfortable silence with you watching all your favourite soaps. I ache to hear your voice, to hear you tell me everything will be OK, you were more than just a mother in law to me, you were my companion, my advisor and confidant, my chief babysitter and most of all my friend.

The girls miss their Nanny so so much, Fi still crys for you everyday and it breaks my heart to see her so lost and alone, you were her best friend too she adored you - they all did. The fact you passed away on Fir's 3rd birthday(and the day before the Twins 1st birthday) makes your death all the more harder to bare. We were on our way to the cinema to watch HSM 3 as a birthday treat for Fi, their first ever trip to the pics, when i decided to stop by to check on you. It was very odd that you hadn't answered the phone or called, given that it was the first night in almost three months you had stayed at your own house and not ours - i just assumed you wanted a night off, god knows you must have been exhausted sleeping with fi"the wriggler" every night and next door to the twins who constantly babbled the whole night long.

Seeing you through the glass i knew instantly that you had gone, yet i didn't want to believe it i frantically tried to get in the house but i couldn't . After what seemed an eternity the ambulance finally arrived, but it was no good my worst fears had been confirmed, i touched your hand and there was nothing there - you just looked like you were fast asleep - i take comfort from the fact you at least looked peaceful, but i am wracked with guilt that it happened on my watch and you were all alone. The rest is all a blur really, i remember grabbing your clothes, taking them with me to smell you and driving to your daughters to break the news, the kids were still in the car and i did my best to stay calm but they knew something terrible had happened. Finally speaking to E was the hardest part, he was stuck in Poland on my brothers stag do till that evening and i couldn't get through to him, he had lost his phone. My dad had to tell him, he was and still is a broken man, you were his whole world the only real family he had. It is a Hugh struggle everyday for him, for us, but you would be so proud of how he is dealing with his grief and trying to forge a future for us all - but without you to share it with, it's bittersweet.

On Saturday you would have turned 75 and it was such a hard day, the kids sang happy birthday to you and we released balloons in the sky and had birthday cake, we try to keep your memory alive by talking about you everyday. It's extremely difficult for E to know the twins will never remember their "Nanny June", you idolised them and they you, i think if it's possible you loved them even more than me and E,always patient and kind with them, nursing them for hours and never hearing a bad word said about them. Hearing them call my mum "Nanny" for the first time just weeks ago was painful, i had to wipe the tears away and look pleased for my mum who was rightly thrilled. Mi and Fi miss playing doctors with you and cuddling you, i miss your amazing cooking, cleaning tips and silly saying like he's "pees above sticks" that one lol, i still don't understand what that means, and E, well he just misses his Mum.

I just want you to know how extremely grateful i am to have had such an amazing woman, a role model in my life for the past nine years. Thank you for always being there, for never saying no - even when you should have, but most of all thank you for teaching me how to be a mum, for that i am eternally thankful. Yours are truly tough shoes to fill and i won't even attempt to, i couldn't, but just know i will try my best by your beloved son as trying as he is at times, and that you are in our hearts forever.

It's better late than never....Recycle week starts now!

2009-06-24T06:25:00.000-07:00

Well I've been a bit lazy of late and have only just managed to force myself into starting the recycling pledge. Thanks to the gruesome twosome that is Emily and Amy i have been shamed into partaking and my pledge is to use up all my leftovers for lunch. It's chicken fajitas tonight ans so i don't think I'll have any leftovers as i make mean Mexican food, even if i do say so myself. However the kids are having some form of pasta so whatever is left will be served up for lunch tomorrow, i have no worries as they will eat ANYTHING!

To make it a little more interesting i have vowed to clean my oven if i fail my recycling challenge, and believe me that's no easy feat as i am quite the minger and my oven hasn't seen soapy liquid or a scourer for the three years I've had it! Out of sight out of mind, that's my excuse anyway, it has to be seen to be believed i'll post a pic - Kym and Aggie would be mortified. Now as I'm a little late i will start the pledge from today and carry it through till next Wednesday, so wish me luck.........

These are the rules......

1. Visit http://www.recyclenow.com/ and sign up to one of the pledges to waste less.

2. Share details of your pledge on your blog.

3. Choose 5 other bloggers who you think will be up for a bit of recycling fun.

4. Return to The Rubbish Diet and share your pledge in the comments section.

5. Optional - As a thank you to all involved, The Rubbish Diet will be publishing a British Mummy Bloggers' Recycling week carnival on Monday 29th June. To be included, simply submit your favourite post revealing the progress of your pledge by Saturday 27th June to karen@therubbishdiet.co.uk

* Sorry but as i have missed the start i will give number 3 a miss......your all safe for now!!!

A fake and a phoney...

2009-06-19T04:51:00.000-07:00

Last night i had my lovely next door neighbours son J over for tea, she's just had a new baby and so i was trying to lighten her load and entertain her little fella. He's the most mild mannered polite little boy i know and makes my girls look like little monsters, they get on brilliantly and play so well together.

I had planned to make a cottage pie from scratch for dinner, J's mummy is quite particular about his diet but had assured me this was one of his favorites. Now being a busy mum of four the chores seemed to just stack up and i was getting nowhere fast, soon it was time to collect Mimi from school and i hadn't even peeled a spud!

So after a quick scan of the fridge and with only 20 minutes until J was arriving, i found three ready made shop bought Shepard's pies at the back of the fridge. In my defence they were healthy living ones bought as a back up for when time was limit ted - this seemed like the perfect excuse and also they had to be eaten that day so.....

I quickly spooned them into an oven dish, popped them in the oven and twenty minutes later passed them off as my own.....am i really naughty? She was non the wiser and as she walked in i was busy boiling some broccoli to accompany MY Shepard's pie, so it wasn't all bad.

Another action packed weekend

2009-06-16T14:30:00.000-07:00

I've just settled down after a hectic day shuttling the four girls to and from school, to playgroup, to nanny and grandads, dance class, tescos and in between i managed a trip to TKMAX and Home and bargain! I love home and bargain it does what it says on the tin and i never leave without spending at least £40 ( even though i only need kitchen roll!). I ended up buying 6 packets of ryvita to compensate for the whole jar of nuttella i done in yesterday, the diet starts today!

You may wonder how i managed to eat a whole jar but believe me it's doable, we spent the whole weekend enjoying the sunshine and was very busy so i needed the sugar boost. Saturday morning me and the big girls went to Gulliver's world in Warrington to celebrate Mimi's friends 5th birthday and we had a fab day, the weather was great, we met Leroy the lion, went on the log flume (amongst other rides) and had a wonderful picnic - cake included. We then went home for a family BBQ and ate a few rather dodgy chops and burgers.

Sunday we went to Ainsdale beach, my brother tagged along as his wife was in London watching Britney (how gutted am i, i could have combined the BMB meet up with a Britney concert if I'd have been on the ball). The kids had so much fun and played in the sand for hours. Eva was her usual moaning self and was only happy when she'd swiped my cider lolly after throwing her lemonade one in the sand mid tantrum. But the other three were in their element, Bella ran around all day long, and the big girls buried uncle As feet in the sand! We finished the day off in style with a last minute trip to McDonald's - happy meals all round!

Watch out Britney and Paris......

2009-06-12T10:15:00.000-07:00

This is Mia and Sofia doing their best Paris and Britney impressions......i take noooo responsibility for the bling bling outfits - they are courtesy of the grandparents.

Techno phobe

2009-06-12T05:03:00.000-07:00

So i have just joined twitter - woop woop! I know it's about time and I'm way behind this whole technology thing but i haven't got a clue and i still don't understand it, but thanks to yummy mammy who is now my first official follower, yeah me. I have yet to post an update as like i say i haven't a clue how it works but I'm sure I'll get the hang of it soon. I also took a tip from susanna over at British mummy bloggers, she advised everyone to add a RSS feed thingy mybob, so i have tried and i think I've done it! It's exhausting keeping up with all these strange new ways to communicate.

Anyway as my minute brain cannot compute anything too trying this afternoon i have decided to complete the tag of "8" s given to me by the lovely Brits in Bosnia.

THE RULES ARE:
1) Mention the person who tagged you (done)
2) Complete the list of 8's
3) Tag 8 others and let them know

So here goes.....

8 Things I'm looking forward to

1. Spending the summer in France
2. My friends wedding next week
3. Having a spray tan for said friends wedding - as I'm WAY too pasty
4. Having all four kids in full time education - only 3 and half more years to go.
5. Watching Mimi and Fi in their first ever dancing recital
6. Devouring the king prawn Cantonese i will be ordering from the take away tonight
7. Finally getting all my brood out of nappies - 2 down(almost), 2 to go
8. Sleep - tonight

8 Things I did yesterday
1. Fished out a huge baby turd from the bath
2. picked up 200 soggy weeto's Bella had thrown over the kitchen floor
3. took the kids to the park
4. went to Ikea to invest in a non mouldy plastic table for the kids(the 4th wooden one from there has weetabix ingrained into it)
5. Washed my hair
6. Cooked spaghetti bolognase - which no one ate?
7. ate a whole packet of custard creams - i didn't even feel guilty
8. Spent a whole hour trying and failing to comment on the brilliant metropolitan mum's blog post about her losing 2lbs this week - well done. I'm sorry but your blog won't let me comment?

8 Things I wish I could do
1. Lose weight - i have no willpower
2. enjoy exercise - i hate it
3. Speak fluent french - i am going to have serious problems come the summer if i don't master this one
4. Not loose my temper and shout at the kids
5. Sing - unfortunately i do not have the voice of an angel
6. enjoy housework and cooking
7. play the piano
8. wear nail polish without it chipping after 30 seconds, subsequently making me look like a total skank!
8 favourite fruits
WTF? Whoever came up with this question needs to get out more - i like most fruits, but not grapefruit!

8 Places I'd like to travel
1. Italy - the Vatican
2. Vegas baby
3. South Africa
4. Dorset
5. Peru
6. Austria
7. the northern lights
8. New Zealand

8 Places I've lived
1. Liverpool - I was born there
2.Switzerland - Spent four months working as a chalet host on my gap year
3. Preston - i went to Uni there
4. France - okay not yet, but we are hoping to very soon
5. Vancouver - well okay this is a fib i spent a few weeks there visiting family when i was sixteen
I haven't lived anywhere else.......yet!

8 people tagged are:

Amy @ and1moremeansfour

Rebel Mother

Emily @ Maternal Tales

Laura @ Are we nearly there yet mummy?

Katherine @ Supply and Demands?

Diary of a suprise mum

Milla

Perfectly Happy Mum

Eyes down for a full house

2009-06-11T14:36:00.000-07:00

I've just returned form my first ever visit to the bingo, well OK i tell a lie i did actually play bingo at Butlins from 1990 - 1995, but seen as i was underage and was playing for sweets and cuddly toys it doesn't count. I can't say i was too impressed, the fact they call it MECCA is hilarious as the clientele was ewt but saintly, i didn't win a thing, NADA, but i did leave feeling slightly svelte and young! The average customer was 25 stone and over the age of sixty five.

So, what was a hip young thing doing down the local bingo hall you might ask? I was cajoled into going with one of my mummy friends, she had been with her mum the previous week and won £360.....so i though i might as well give it a go, as they say "you've got be in it to win it." I'm sorry i bothered i didn't even get a "sweat on" and am ashamed to say i struggled to keep up with all those numbers flying around, i gave up in the end. I received some very hostile stares and the regulars was anything but welcoming, it made the yummy mummy brigade at Mia's school gates look like sweet little kittens in comparison, so i don't think I'll be going again.

It's official....i'm a lightweight!

2009-06-09T08:37:00.001-07:00

This weekend i escaped from my mummy job and spent the night on the town in Leeds with my bestest and some old school friends, i had a ball and i definitely needed to let my hair down but i don't think i will be repeating it anytime soon. You see i am a major lightweight and since having kids i am laughable, making it past 12:30 am is considered an all nighter for me now!

So having spent all Saturday night in and out of all the glamorous bars and on the guest list of some apparently exclusive nightclub, it got to two am and i was seriously flagging, i wanted to take off my dancing shoes head straight home and have a cup of tea. My party mad best friend was not the slightest bit impressed, but i pouted and refused to dance anymore, so she had no choice to admit defeat - i mean two am is commendable for me! We stopped off for the essential kebab and i was tucked up in bed and fast asleep for three thirty.

To be honest going out on the town doesn't hold much appeal to me anymore, i build it up in my head and get really excited about having a good dance and getting all dolled up but after about two hours i find myself wondering what the kids are up too and wishing i was home reading them their bedtime story. I know i sound so dull, and i can assure you i was quite the party animal pre-kids, but if i want to completely let myself go then i need to be hammered and i just cannot take the hangovers anymore, they no longer last a day but all week, and it's just not worth it. We had a great time travelling down to Leeds on the train and meeting my friend for lunch in Nandos (mmmmmmm..so delicious), and the best part of the whole weekend was getting ready with my mates over a few bottles of wine and swapping make up tips, something i haven't done in years and had forgotten how much fun it is. I guess i really am growing up - scary!

I really shouldn't have worried about the kids though as they were busy being spoiled by my parents (hence the chavtastic outfits) who had taken them out on a shopping spree, Mimi resembled Paris Hilton and Fi looked like Britney.

Knickerless!

2009-06-04T10:48:00.000-07:00

The perils of not having a car are beginning to take it's toll now and if i never see a black cab again it will be too soon, i promise i will do a post soon dedicated to the loss of my car and all will be revealed it's just i am still to traumatised to talk about it yet!

Me and the girls took a cab to visit my friend J and her two girls, it took all my strength just to get us out of the door as Mimi is becoming quite the little diva; demanding matching bobbles, bunches not plates, bratz knickers not Cinderella ones, aquafresh toothpaste not crest, a skirt not shorts, readybrek not weetabix and no plumbs in her socks (don't ask) - she is exhausting. We finally made it to my friends house and had a lovely time, whilst me and J drunk lots of tea and discussed what i should wear to my friends wedding in two weeks (i still haven't bought a dress) the girls were busy playing in the tree house and the twins were fascinated with their gorgeous pet rabbit Pepito. We were discussing clothes when she started to explain how she was wearing big granny pants today and how uncomfortable they were in comparison to her usual thongs, i don't know about you but i am definitely a fan of big pants and could not think of anything worse than a piece of string stuck in between my arse. whilst we are on the topic of knickers i was horrified to discover, whilst in the middle of a very busy park, that Mimi was wearing NO knickers! We had decided later on in the afternoon to take a stroll to the local play area and as i was helping the girls onto the climbing frame i spotted mi flashing everything she's not got. I was mortified, she must have forgotten in the midst of her morning tantrum and i didn't think to look - bad mummy.

Help...my friend's been facebooked!

2009-06-01T12:48:00.000-07:00

Having waved Mr Bold off this morning bright and early, i busied myself with cleaning the hell hole that is our home. We are infested with ants and so i have cleaned the play room form top to bottom, finding a half eaten apple, thousands of crumbs some digestive biscuits and a few discarded raisins along the way - no wonder we have ants, I'm lucky it's not rats! All this was not just in aid of the ants but also due to my friend and her daughter coming for dinner and a play.

Well i am sorry i bothered i went through all the trouble of getting myself, the girls and my house (Including the garden) in top top shape only for her to turn up two hours late, eat and drink me out of house and home and spend the whole day on FACEBOOK!

She gave me a total of 30 minutes undivided attention which involved me listening and sympathising with her tales of what a wanker her soon to be ex - husband is, and never once let me finish a sentence. Throughout the eight hours of her visit she never once acknowledged my attempts at making conversation with her and stared at MY laptop all day laughing to herself and trying to come up with witty replies to messages she had received from random men she has been flirting with. She then had the audacity to fall asleep on my sofa for an hour, i finally got rid of her at 10pm this evening and i am fuming,needless to say she won't be getting another invite - the cheeky cow.

On a lighter note i would like to say a huge thank you to clareybabbling and rebel mother for their kind "lovely blog" awards, they have made my day all the more bearable, cheers.

Absense really does make the heart grow fonder

2009-05-31T14:53:00.000-07:00

It is now week two of the school holidays and i am pleasantly surprised i have yet felt the need to shove my head in the oven. Usually by this point i am shaking with rage and unable to control my bubbling anger as the kids run wild, fight, scream profanities at each other and generally drive me to the edge of insanity, the fact that i am still relatively sane is wondrous. I think the shift in the kids behaviour is mainly due to the fabulous weather we are lucky to be getting, it's amazing how peoples moods shift up three gears when the sun is shinning - i tell you they should bottle the stuff.

However the rays of sunshine have done little to lighten Mr Bolds fowl moods of late and he is pacing the house like a bear with a soar head, testing my patience to the maximum. He seems to think that because he is having a bad day then me and the girls should too, god forbid we play in the paddling pool and make the garden a little muddy with splashes of fun. The fact that he is off to France tomorrow for two days, (we are in the process of buying a house in France and so need to open a french bank account, but that's a whole other post) i think, is contributing to his torridness as he is a little apprehensive about flying. I for one can't bloody wait, apart from having to put the bins out myself and locking up the house alone, i am looking forward to having the house to myself and only having four kids to moan at me not five!

The credit crunch is not helping my marriage either, he is self employed and so as business is not exactly booming he is spending increasingly more time at home. I liked it when i was left to my own devices now he has a lot more input into our domestic set up i am becoming increasingly resentful and cabin fever has set in arrghhhhhhh.......ok rant over! Don't get me wrong i love him and he is an incredible husband and father, but men and women should never have to spend this amount of time together, it's unnatural!!!!

Arty Farty

2009-05-28T12:28:00.000-07:00

We had a great day today at the walker art gallery in Liverpool. Firstly there was the train ride which is always a treat for the big girls, unfortunately the joys of public transport are lost on me. We arrived to meet my cousin and her 18 month old little girl and i was pleasantly surprised at the abundance of activities on offer for the little ones. They had a whole room designated to children with a craft station, dressing up corner, puppet section and lots of computers, puzzles and books, the twins (who i was worried would be a little too young) had a ball. Upstairs in the gallery was another activity station where the big girls got to make their very own photo frame and i even managed to treat myself to a hot chocolate, complete with cream and marshmallows, i even finished it before it went cold, but the best bit was that everything bar the hot choccy was FREE!

After taking a break for a spot of lunch we then headed to the world museum which to be honest was a bit of a let down and a lot of hassle to navigate with a twin stroller and a three and four year old in tow. The highlight of the afternoon was when Fi fondled a roman statue:

"mummy Fifi's touching the old mans willy" - Mimi said excitedly

After me and my cousin had composed ourselves and wiped the tears of laughter away, we quickly vacated the building to treat ourselves to some well deserved ice cream from the van outside.

On the train ride home, exhausted and feeling rather pleased with myself that the museum had been a hit with the girls, Fifi announces to the whole train that Mimi had just said "sexy." A little flustered i told mi not to say such a word, when fi shouts again:

"But mummy she said a swear word, she said sex again."

Kids have a habit of bringing you back down to earth with a bang don't they? I did get a few glances but believe me they have said much worse in public, so again i think that overall the day was a success!

I got an award!

2009-05-27T12:02:00.000-07:00

Thank you to the amazing Amy over at and1moremeansfour for my first ever award! I cannot believe it and am so grateful.

The rules of this award are that we need to choose 7 blogs to pass this award onto, and list 10 facts about ourselves as well. Here are my chosen brilliant blogs:

All grown up

clareybabbling

soft in the head

baby blog

A Mothers ramblings

Ramblings of a fab brunette

Freelance mum
And now for the ten facts about me, they are all pretty random but here goes.

1) My claim to fame is that i was once on TV with Mr motivator - i was eleven and was on holiday in benidorm.

2) my passion is SLEEP - i love it and do it as much as i can, although with four kids i don't get nearly as much as i would like.

3) I love to pick, squeeze and prod spots, black heads and i am always cleaning my ears and any one's who will let me near them - weird i know but i can't help it!

4) My addiction is chocolate - i am at my happiest when attacking a jar of nutella with a tablespoon and devouring it.

5) I am a terrible driver and will not drive on a motorway EVER!

6) I can snowboard -admittedly not very well.

7) I still think i am sixteen and resort to watching the oc, one tree hill, and my favorite gossip girl - it makes me feel young again.

8) I secretly fancy Mathew Wright - i know it is so WRONG but i can't explain it. The heart wants what the heart wants :)

9) I believe in angels

10) I once fell down the stairs (arse over tit)in a very expensive local boutique, and if that wasn't embarrassment enough the heel from my new shoes completely snapped off! As i hobbled around the store red faced and desperate to make a sharp exit, the owner insisted he mend my shoe for me at the shop next door, so i had no choice but to make some purchases and left the store £260 lighter and the proud owner of a see through firetrap dress amongst other things. I never showed my face in there again but at least my shoes were fixed!

our day out

2009-05-24T15:42:00.000-07:00

The bold household was up bright and early this morning for a fun filled family day out. We had planned to visit the beach maybe or the zoo, but both these ideas had been poo pooed by my dearest hubby on account of his aversion to sand and overly crowded places. Finally and after much deliberation (involving three slanging matches) we settled on a visit to "speak hall", a grand manor house only 30 minutes drive away.

Arriving at the stately home, and having realised i had forgotten to bring the picnic we had pain stakingly put together at the last minute, we headed straight for the cafe to fill up on overpriced sandwiches and drinks. Stomachs full and kids loaded with chocolate buttons we headed for the nature trail and took a stroll through the beautiful grounds and amazing bluebell forest. We all had a great day and we finished off by letting the kids run wild on the playground area,all the fresh air and exercise worked wonders and by half six in the evening all four fell fast asleep......amazing.

When it all goes "tits" up

2009-05-23T11:46:00.000-07:00

So i have just finished talking to one of my single mummy friends on the phone, she's feeling a little down at the moment as she's had a serious of disastrous dates and is certain that she's destined to grow old and grey all alone and will never have sex ever again, which is ludicrous considering she is only twenty eight, slim, reasonably attractive and intelligent. Having tired of Internet dating, speed dating, general pulling on the piss she has now become increasingly desperate and has resorted to blind dating with rather unfortunate consequences.

Her friend who is a solicitor decided to play match maker and set her up with a colleague, whom although wasn't lacking in looks was suffering a serious deficit in the personality department. My friend complained he was obnoxious, shallow and rude to all the staff at the pretentious restaurant he insisted on taking her to, yet still she was upset at his apparent lack of interest (he hasn't called since and it's been 9 days). I was about to assure her she did not need some self important prick in her life and she could do so much better, when she regaled me with the tale of how the date ended.

Somewhat disappointed at how the blind date was unfolding she had decided the least she was going to get out of this was a decent snog, giving that he was still good looking and well a girl has needs. Things began to get amorous rather quickly and whilst he was busy suckling on her breasts, she suddenly said:

"careful you don't suck too hard"

"Why?" he asked looking puzzled

"oh I've not long stopped breast feeding and if you suck too hard you might get some milk."

Needless to say the moment was ruined, his disgusted face said it all and the heavy petting was brought to an abrupt end. He quickly bungled her into a taxi and that's the last she has seen of him, unsurprisingly. I have to say as much as i am mortified for her i am also thankful I'm out of the dating game. It was hard enough when i was baggage free and fat free, now with four kids and sagging boobs to contend with i think I'd rather poke pins in my eyes than put myself through the torture of dating again. My friend has resolved to give men a miss for now and put any further dates on hold, until she recovers from her trauma and i for one don't blame her one bit.

Birthday blues

2009-05-19T06:36:00.000-07:00

Yesterday i turned twenty six, and it was as uneventful as most birthdays past the age of thirteen tend to be. No cake, no "happy birthday to you" sung to me at the crack of dawn which you might expect from a house filled with little people. You see my husband who was due back from his boys only weekend at midnight on Sunday, decided to call me at 10pm with the news that he had "accidentally" missed his flight home. Needless to say i was not buying any of it, i slammed the phone down and uttered obscenities to myself vowing to make him pay. It's bad enough he lied to me but to act with such total disregard for me on my BIRTHDAY - i wanted to boil his head!

So i awoke all alone, no cards and with no one to look after the kids i had no choice but to cancel the Indian head massage and pedicure my mum had booked for me at the local spa. The day was pretty much a non starter and after avoiding Mr Bold for the whole day, filling my time with a spot of retail therapy and lots of cheesecake, i finally returned home to be give him a piece of my mind.

The silent treatment had obviously worked, he couldn't apologise enough and had bought me an abundance of random belated birthday gifts to help ease his guilty conscience and so he bloody well should have. They were all lovely apart from the chavtastic silver "seksy" watch he had also bought on the plane, recommended to him by the air hostess, need i say more. Why is it that men are so incapable of buying decent presents? They think if it costs more than fifty quid they are on to a winner,their brain must malfunction at the slightest mention of the word "present". I suppose i should be grateful he at least made the effort, after all it's the thought that counts isn't it?

Every cloud!

2009-05-16T15:31:00.000-07:00

Today has been the day from hell, i was lucky enough to have the pleasure of escorting my four year old to another (yawn) school friends party! Only this time it was not being held at a local indoor soft play area,shock horror, yes this child's mother actually had a little imagination and hired out the local church hall to hold a "gymbobs" party.

Gymbobs being the slightly older version of tumble tots, with lots of structured and most importantly supervised games, which has to be said was a thousand times more appealing than having to climb through an assault course of netting and tubular slides to rescue my hysterical snot covered daughter from a demented psycho child high on fruit shoots that has just whacked her over the head for no reason at all! However, with all four kids in tow and no car it was never going to be plain sailing, i had no choice but to call a black cab which i patiently waited over fifty minutes for to no avail.

Now nearly twenty minutes late and with Mimi starting to look upset we headed for the bus stop at the end of the road, Que heavy showers of torrential rain followed by a very wet ten miute wait for the bus,and we had almost made it. After a brisk walk we finally arrived soaked to the bone, miserable and 50 minutes late! You'd think that would be embarrassment enough but oh no Mimi decided to have a tantrum and refuse to join in the party on the grounds of having very wet pants and again in the space of two minutes we were center of attention for all the wrong reasons.

eventually and with the help of some very kind parents Mimi joined the rest of the screaming five year olds and i am pleased to report lots of fun was had indeed.even Fi was asked to join in on account of birthday boys mummy taking pity on her - i defy anyone with half a heart to ot be completely won over by her charms she is so adorably cute. I have to add though i would never usually take the other three to tag along at parties and vice versa, as i hate it when people do that it was just i had no one else to mind the kids as hubby is away for the weekend and my parents are too.

So the girls had fun which was my number one priority and i managed, through gritted teeth, to look enthusiastic and polite whilst listening and responding to the mind numbingly monotonous comments about my brood i.e:

"Are they twins? - 3 comments

"you have four children and they are all girls?" - 1 comment

"you have got your hands full" - 5 comments

"you've done so well to make it here, i don't know how you make it out the door" - 2 comments

"are they identical?" - 2 comments

"which ones the more dominant?" - 1 comment

"Do twins run in the family?" - 1 comment

"have you got two sets of twins?" - 2 comments

"are you gonna keep trying for a boy then?" -1 comment

You get the picture and to round my day off perfectly we then had a forty five minute wait for our bus home, but the silver lining and i did have to really want to see it was that at least we were all now dry!

Mummy i wish i was a robot!

2009-05-15T13:41:00.000-07:00

Kids are in bed, no husband in sight, the television is all MINE......pure bliss! I'm feeling rather pleased with myself as i have managed to single handedly get all four kids fed, bathed and in bed with stories and cuddles by 7pm!!

Yes, i know it sounds like a miracle but i can assure you i used only my own charms and a little chocolate milk, no raphynol or any other substances were involved. I have pulled out all the stops tonight as last nights bedtime was a disaster, leaving me in serious doubt over my mothering skills.

Let me explain, it all started when i promised Mimi who's four going on fourteen that she could use the computer before bedtime:

"Mummy can i please , please have a game on cbeebies please...oh and a story from the tweenies mummy now?"

"Yes sweetie, of course you can, but mummy just needs to finish her work first OK? It's very important." (note by work i mean updating my status on facebook and checking out everyone Else's)

"Mummy now can i do my game?" 1 minute later

"yes Mi just a minute."

"Mummy ple....mu....game...ple.." falling asleep.

Some four hours later, Mimi awoke form her bed and began screaming uncontrollably about the sodding cbeebies game that mummy had not let her play, waking all three of her sisters in the process. Why do kids remember every bloody thing in minute detail?

So i tried to appease her with cuddles, promises that tomorrow evening she can have two games, three games four games,i even resorted to trying to calm her with a my little pony DVD but even that didn't work. I was about to loose my cool and blow my top when she hit me with:

"wah.....wah...I wish god had made me into a robot!" - WTF!

"Mimi don't say things like that honey you are a very lucky little girl, some children do...."

"nonono...wah...wah...i do i wish i was a robot and i didn't have these stupid bones and i was not a kiddie....then i could do whatever i want!....wah.."

Given that it was 11:30pm and i was seriously disturbed with what had just come out of my four year old's mouth i had no choice but to buckle and let her have her game and story time if she promised not to tell her 3 year old sister who was still awake upstairs.

So we sat in the dark, in our living room playing dress Mr Tumble followed by the story of Hansel and Gretal - Mimi's choice not mine. And as if i wasn't worried enough already, the fact my daughter chose a bedtime story about cannibalism left me in no doubt whatsoever that she is emotionally unhinged!

So i have made every effort today to assure her she is a special, cleaver, funny, kind, lovable, gorgeous little girl and so far there has been no mention of robots and the bedtime story she chose, i am pleased to report, had no mention of witches eating children.

Sun, sea , sand, sangria and Sticky Vicky

2009-05-13T06:07:00.001-07:00

Well i am now back from my little girlie jaunt and oh what fun was had by all. We laughed so hard for 4 whole days that i have pains in muscles i haven't felt (or seen) in years! The Hen had a total of 6 hours sleep in three nights, i wasn't such a party animal and averaged around four hours kip a night which given my reputation as a lightweight was not bad at all really.

Sticky Vicky was the highlight of the weekend and for those of you who are not familiar with the legendary 70 year old here is a brief outline of her talents - she performs rather intimate tricks such as lighting light bulbs with her vaginal muscles and pulling razor blades out of her lady garden! Classy i know but it has to be seen to be believed!

There was a live sex show too which i missed due to my cripplingly soar feet (damn you stupid 4 inch heels) and i have to say i was rather a little disappointed as how often do you get the chance to see that lol - saying that i think it was a blessing in disguise as i am rather prudish and may have fainted at the sight of such debauchery.

The sangria was a flowing and the sun was shining all week long although it never did penetrate my factor 30 and I'm ashamed to say I'm as pasty now as i was before i had my fake tan (which has now worn off) and i look like i have a skin condition similar to wacko jackos with random patches of brown all over my body - not attractive in the slightest!

So its back to the grind stone of motherhood and ground hog day has commenced once again.......until next year that is, we have decided to make it an annual trip and with weddings lined up until 2011 we have at least another 2 years to marry off the rest of my single friends which could take us all the way to 2020 - hen do's galore!!!

I'm off to sunny spain......

2009-04-29T05:06:00.000-07:00

In need of a whole new wardrobe for the impending Hen party on friday, i made a mad dash to primani to stock up on all my essentials including:

orange tulip dress
black linen pants
black skirt
4 vest tops
4 underwear sets
tights
necklace
bangles
ear rings
bag
purse
towel
brush
pyjama bottoms
make up bag
pink eyeshadow
flip flops
fold away magic pumps

Total: £100.98!!!!

What a bargain all that for a hundred pounds, i saw the exact same dress (orange tulip) in topshop for £65 last week and although it's not usually my style i decided to live dangerously and be a little more daring as i never get to dress up much. Not sure orange is my colour though, the last time i wore it i think i was eleven and even though I'm roughly the same age as Cheryl Cole (who has sported a dress very much like mine recently) that's where the similarity begins and ends! I'm not a size 6, toned, tanned dark haired doll like siren, i am a blond, pasty, curvaceous(lumpy) size 14 and the only doll i resemble is a cabbage patch one or at least i will after the flight!

I know my shopping spree wasn't exactly ethical but we are in the middle of a credit crunch don't you know and anyway the money I've saved from not shopping in zara and topshop can now be happily spent on a blow dry and a (very MUCH needed) spray tan!

Well that's how I'm justifying it and seen as i am in denial about my actual body shape, I'm really size 8 trapped in the body of a flump, i cannot allow myself to waste a lot of money on clothes that will no longer fit me once I'm back to my svelte pre - baby weight. This insane rationalisation has been going on for five years now and i am convinced that once I've started my extreme diet, I'll be a size 10 again in three months and can buy a load of new clothes form Karen Millen and ted Baker - the problem is i have no will power and I'm in danger of looking like makka pakka forever!

Panic attacks and agoraphobia

2009-04-27T03:39:00.000-07:00

Calm has descended in the bold house after what has been a nightmare of a morning. The twins are having their nap and fi is busy painting at the table - silence is golden, but I'm making the most of it as it definitely will not be for long.

The terrible twins have tag teamed me all morning with incessant and totally unjustified screaming, bottles, juice, toast, weetabix, bananas, grapes, even a biscuit or two have not done the trick still they cry as if it is the end of the world with real globe sized tears streaming their bright red tomato faces.

I tried bathing them to calm them down that didn't work, and as soon as i tried to wash out the weetabix matted in their hair and snot that had crystallized in their eyebrows they erupted again, culminating with Evie pooing in the bath. After evacuating the shitty water, i attempted to fish the poo out of the bath and in doing so neglected the fact they were still without a nappy, yes you guessed it Bella felt left out and so to rectify this she proceeded to poo all over the new bedroom carpet, i only realized when i smelt it and by this time she had walked it in and it was stuck in between her toes and squished all over her heal.

After round two in the bath i am pleased to report there was no more pooing, but the crying never stopped. Trying to put the dishes away i tripped over a twin who was clinging to my ankles and smashed 4 plates - luckily no one was hurt but the same can't be said for my lovely teal blue "posh" dinner plates. I think maybe that babies are like animals and can sense your moods and then tend to replicate them.

I've found myself getting highly emotional the past couple of days, crying whilst watching the London marathon on more than one occasion, losing my temper a lot and i even had a panic attack yesterday which was just awful. I 've had them before, they started when i was about 19 on my gap year working in Switzerland as a chalet host, i put it down to the altitude, home sickness and my fear of dying whilst snowboarding or in one of those horrendous cable cars! Yet they only lasted a week or two and had more or less disappeared until November when my mother in law died. Since then I've had three, two in the car and one on a jam packed train at Christmas time.

Yesterday's was by far the worst, Mr bold and the big girls had nipped into the supermarket and he locked the car without thinking with me and the twins inside. I was busy reading YOU magazine and catching up on Liz Jones latest instalment about her dead cat when i suddenly realized i was trapped - panic set in, i felt a hot flush rise all up my body to my head, palpitations started, i felt like i couldn't breath and was going to die - irrational as it sounds now i just went CRAZY and i needed to get out but i couldn't. Shaking and trembling with fear i managed to get the attention of a man in the next car and mouthed to him my sir name and asked if he could get the supermarket to announce over the sound system that i was trapped in the car - what he must have thought of this raving lunatic i dread to think - but obligingly he did as i had asked and went on his way. Some 10 minutes later Mr Bold and the girls emerged laden with bags of naughty food oblivious to my panic and terror. As soon as i heard the sound of the car unlocking i jumped out and took a huge breath, then began berating my poor husband calling him all names under the sun for not coming to my rescue sooner - apparently he hadn't heard the announcement in the supermarket. He wasn't at all fazed by my plight and was mortified that i had acted like a loony attracting the attention of passers bye when i knew he would only be a few minutes!

I'm lucky to have such a sympathetic husband, but i suppose if you have never experienced a panic attack like that then i probably did appear neurotic and dramatic. I'm really worried now though, as i am off to Spain on Friday for my friends hen party and the thought of getting on a plane fills me with dread, even though i have never had a panic attack on a plane before and i am perfectly fine with flying. I don't want it to ruin what will be my first girlie holiday since i have had children (the last was Cyrus and sooo much fun) but i can't help but worry now. Last night i decided to google "panic attacks" and not surprisingly my findings have done little to dissipate my fears. Apparently i have panic disorder and am agoraphobic, Below is the definition of agoraphobia:

Agoraphobia (from Greek aγορά, "marketplace"; and φόβος/φοβία, -phobia) is an anxiety disorder, often precipitated by the fear of having a panic attack in a setting from which there is no easy means of escape. As a result, sufferers of agoraphobia may avoid public and/or unfamiliar places. In severe cases, the sufferer may become confined to his or her home, experiencing difficulty traveling from this "safe place."

Indeed this totally explains the terror i feel at just the thought of going near a motorway - in "which there is no easy means of escape". My friends often poke fun at me about this and my husband who is extremely pragmatic and tackles everything head on is simply dumbfound at my inability to lead a "normal" life. I cannot handle change, won't step out of my comfort zone and my heart beats like a drum at the thought of having to drive in an area i do not know - i only travel within a radius of 10 miles, and i have to take exactly the same routes each time avoiding busy crossroads or t junctions.

I feel like a freak now, especially since my husband seems to think it's all in my head - of course it is - but i can't simply just "get over it" like he seems to think i can. Anyone any answers???

Not pramface!

2009-04-25T07:01:00.000-07:00

Being a mother of four at the ripe old age of 26 raises a fare few eyebrows, and on establishing the rather large brood in front of them are ALL mine people tend to take a sharp intake of breath followed by the usual:

"Are they all yours?"

"you've got your hands full"

"rather you than me"

"good luck with that lot"

"you need to get a T.V in your house love"

"oh my god"

"don't know how you cope"

"you deserve a medal"

Honestly you would think i was Vicky Pollard by the looks of disdain shot my way. Me and my husband have been together for ten years now, it is the only serious relationship i have ever had, admittedly only half my brood have been conceived in wedlock - but still by today's standards that still makes me positively saintly.

Is it just me or do any other young mums out there get tarred with the same "pramface" brush?

I want to scream no I'm not a 4x4 mum (sorry Ulrika), i am happily(most of the time) married to the father of all my children, i am relatively well educated thank you very much and I'm a bloody good mum! I have just happend to live my life back to front!

Random questions?

2009-04-23T13:11:00.001-07:00

My gorgeous four girls

"Mum why does Santa's sleigh not have seat belts on it?" - 4 yr old

"mum why are we shaped like rectangles?"

"Why are my eyes round like a circle?" - 3 yr old

"Can plane's fly to heaven?"

"Mum does the easter bunny live on easter island?"

"can we go to new york tomorrow?"

"why does tomato ketchup have tomatoes in it?" - 4 yr old

"mummy why do you have boobies?"

"mummy why does daddy have boobies?" - 3yr old

All these questions in just three hours, i need to go to bed now so it can all start again tomorrow:)

kids arn't made for walking!

2009-04-21T06:56:00.000-07:00

My feet are throbbing and my legs feel like lumps of wood, I've just returned from collecting the girls from preschool and what should have been a leisurely 30 minute stroll has taken nearly three hours.

Firstly Fi insisted on stopping for lunch at the local cafe where we had soup and sandwiches followed by lots of fruit to keep the twins happy. Next we called at the bank to get some more pennies as i had spent up on lunch, we then needed to stop by the shop for some washing up liquid and juice which resulted in a tantrum over mini eggs - I'm pleased to report i did not give in although I'm still not sure who i was punishing given that i can still hear ringing in my ears!

Nearing home i suddenly remembered our ant infestation and made an about turn to the handy man store where i purchased ant powder and spray - I'll get rid of them little buggers once and for all!

Poor fi's legs gave way just as we were making progress so i bribed her with the promise of choccy buttons if she'd stop crying and make it home without me having to maneuver a double buggy, bags of shopping and a screaming 3 year old with only two arms.

With the finishing line in sight and home literally around the corner Fi hit the floor, tripping over her own feet and grazing both knees. super sonic screaming ensued and no amount of chocy buttons was going to calm this situation so i tried my best to carry her home to no avail, when out of nowhere my friendly local florist, who happens to live at the bottom of my road, appeared from her house like a fairy godmother.

Fi was all smiles again in no time, lapping up the attention and the twins had finally fell asleep. Florist lady then gave me the low down on her new nightmare neighbours - they had done a moonlight flit from their last home owing three months rent (which just happened to be two streets away) and this is the fourth time they have moved in 18 months! Apparently they are notorious for fleecing unsuspecting home owners out of months worth of rent and now no local estate agents will touch them with a barge pole - unfortunately florist Lady's previous neighbours had handled things themselves to avoid paying any agency fees and are only now finding out about their tenants abysmal reputation. Some people have no shame!

Happy Holidays

2009-04-20T04:25:00.000-07:00

Well my nerve's are shot, my patience has evaporated and my home is even more of a bombsite than it was before the half term holidays began but finally i can now see a glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. Yes today is the last day of the easter holidays - thank Christ, we have had an action packed two weeks including several easter egg hunts, lots of walks to feed the ducks, trips to the park, disastrous bike rides, many play dates, picnic's, visits to the local pets corner and a few tantrums thrown in for good measure. School along with the frantic regimented mornings of packed lunch making, breakfast inhaling, getting four kids up, dressed and out the door hopefully all with sparkling clean teeth will come as a welcomed relief!

Today we had planned a family trip to a local museum hoping the lasting memory of the holidays would would be of educational fun not of eating 90 easter eggs and playing dens in the garden, yes i want the teachers at school to think I've made more of an effort than plying my kids with chocolate for two weeks and letting them run wild making their own fun. Instead due to Mr Bolds erratic working hours we have had to postpone the museum until further notice and settle on trip to the swimming pool for daddy and the big girls - yes mummy will be staying at home with the twins trying to make some headway on the two months worth of ironing i have piled up in the spare bedroom - out of site out of mind, well that's my excuse.

The girls are now eagerly awaiting daddy's arrival with swimming caps at the ready and 2 minute intervals of "when is daddy home?" and "It's not fair...he's taking to long!"

To be fair he was due back half an hour ago but he has just called to say he's running a little late and will be another hour, now all i have to do is keep them entertained till he gets here and I'll have made it through the holidays relatively unscathed - compared to the last school holidays that's a huge success.

Slummy mummy

2009-04-15T04:36:00.000-07:00

Having scoured the empty fridge and the bare cupboards for something to rustle up quickly for the kids tea i realised the easiest option was to shut the twins up (who were clinging to my limbs screaming like banshees) with a bowl of cereal and a yogurt or two. I know I'll hardly be a candidate for mother of the year but it did the job and i then had a moments silence to think of something to make the older two - i settled on a tin of Heinz tomato soup (it was either that or evaporated milk) and the last three slices of bread.

Whilst rustling up the soup(taking all of 3 mins in the microwave) Mimi came rushing in from the garden demanding to know what exactly is for tea and if she could have another Easter egg instead, she stopped in her tracks when she noticed the twins munching on a large bowl of cornflakes each.

"muuuumm" snigger "why are the twins having cornflakes for dinner" snigger.

I then began to explain that mummy and daddy had not been shopping yet, but before i could finish, she was skipping outside into the garden to announce to her sister and the whole neighbourhood what a terrible mother i am.

"Guess what Fi the twins are having CORNFLAKES for the tea"

"CORNFLAKES"Fi shouts "but mummy why have you give the twins CORNFLAKES for their tea?" she says whilst trying to fit her head through the kitchen window with her bike helmet on to get a closer look at the twins.

The two of them then persisted to giggle with one another and discuss how bazaar it was to them that mummy had given their sisters cereal for tea, loud enough for my nosy neighbours to hear everything. Oh the shame!

In my defence i would like to add that the Easter holidays has played havoc with our usual shopping schedule, i can assure you my children are usually well fed and get their five a day (most days), so to avoid any further embarrassment or a call from the social services I'm am off now to the local supermarket to stock up on LOTS of perishables. With four kids in tow I'm not sure I'll have the time or the energy once we make it back home to cook a cottage pie from scratch - it's more likely to be fish fingers and frozen veg, well it's definitely an improvement from last nights menu.