the Best Laid schemes...

Thursday saw my very first blogging blind date and I'm pleased to report i needn't have been so nervous, for AMY over at and1moremeansfour was lovely and so friendly,
as was her two oldest little Lady's, they are gorgeous and very charming. The time flew by,i felt so at ease with Amy, it was as if we had known each other forever, I'm certain we'll be the bestest of blogging buddies for a long time to come and we already have plans to meet again at the North west meet up being organised over at British Mummy Bloggers. To find out more about our Mummy blind date and what we got up to click here.

Me and Mr Bold had been planning to take the free mini break to Alton towers that i had won courtesy of Andrex over at Laura Drivers Blog are we nearly there yet mummy? on Friday, it was a two night break at a lovely 4* hotel and a two day pass to Alton Towers for us and our two big girls. Unfortunately our Babysitters let us down TWICE and so we have had to re schedule for October, however not wanting to disappoint our very excited little gals we decided to use the free tickets and head for a day out at Alton Towers instead ensuring the weekend wasn't a total wash out for the kids. We set off bright and early Saturday morning with the obligatory stop off at MacDonald's for a breakfast muffin or three and we then headed straight for the M6. After only three minutes into what looked like the start of a very bad traffic jam i had a light bulb moment, instead of queuing in traffic for a few hours to then queue for fair rides for hours why didn't we just head for our local theme park Camelot and pass it off to the kids as THE Alton Towers?

Being the evil genius that i am it worked like a charm, we took the nearest slip road and arrived at our destination in under twenty minutes with the kids chanting "Alton Towers, Aton Towers YEAH!! Mr Bold fell in love with me all over again when he realised he had avoided bumper to bumper traffic. We had a fabulous time, even the terrible weather could not deter us from having fun as we went on numerous twirling rides, log flumes and the Caterpillar roller coaster. We took shelter from the non stop showers to watch a medieval duel with knights on horse back whilst munching on candy floss and ice cream and Mr Bold finished off by squandering the best part of thirty quid trying in vain to win an over grown stuffed animal, we appeased the kids with a toy from the gift shop on our way out of the park and headed straight for the cinema.

Having saved ourselves a few hours of travelling time we decided to take the kids to watch G-Force, the new animation film out that's about Super spying Gerbils i know it sounds a little insane but it was actually quite funny and I'd definitely recommend it if your stuck for something to do tomorrow as it looks set to be ANOTHER very wet Bank holiday! Mia and Sofia loved their first trip to the cinema and with their eyes stuck to the screen they nibbled their way through lots of popcorn, god help us at the dentist on Tuesday. We finished our day trip with a visit to "Frankie and Benny's", which quite Frankie (ha see what i did there) was abysmal never ever get the Spinach and ricotta cannelloni it was nasty!

I'm off now to wash the dishes and put the kids t bed, just in time for me to watch "Wuthering Heights" on Itv, OH the thought of Andrew Lincoln in breaches mmmmm.......Hope you all have a nice bank holiday.

Wordless Wednesday

Unfortunately being a mummy has led to a drastic change in underwear, gone are the days of expensive pretty wonder bra's and frilly french knickers, instead i have now resigned myself to the fact that i will forever live in spandex!

The Jacob and Esau effect?

"Which twin was born first?" is something i have often been asked since becoming a mum of multiples and i recently stumbled across a post titled just that over at http://twinparenthood.com/ which has got me thinking, does it actually matter?

Being a mum of two singletons prior to my set of twins has left me in no doubt that the order in which your children are born does affect their own perceptions as to what their role is within the family unit. However it seems absurd to suggest that the same can be said about twins given that only a few minutes not years are all that separates them. There is nothing significant that can take place during such a short amount of time that can seriously influence the individual child's perception of his or her position within the family.

Taking this into consideration the only explanation can be that we as parents and as a society subconsciously impose our own beliefs about the importance of birth order onto the children, thus creating a self fulfilling prophecy. Often i have heard "she is so much bigger than the other twin she must be the oldest" or "you can tell she's the oldest one as she is definitely the boss". I myself am even guilty of falling into this trap, when trying to encourage my twins speech along i immediately concentrated more on Eva's (who is the oldest by 12 minutes)speech as opposed to Isabella's. I wrongly assumed that because Eva was the oldest and most assertive at the time she would be quicker to grasp the concept. I was proved wrong by Isabella almost immediately who started rambling away a whole two months before Eva, i soon learned to stop pigeon holing them.

Birth order definitely creates a competitive streak amongst siblings, my eldest daughter has inevitably take on the role as leader, boss of the playroom and she sees herself as the authority figure amongst all her sisters. My second daughter has become the "naughty little sister" - causing havoc and mischief to get attention, whilst trying to assert herself as her older sisters equal yet at the same time looking to her for guidance in many things like, reading, singing and manipulating mummy and daddy. This for me definitely cements the "middle child syndrome" theory and gives credence to the popular line of thinking that birth order reflects lifelong personality traits.

Having said all this i am still at odds with the notion that this can apply to twins. Eva and Isabella are both as bad as one another, sure they are polar opposites in every way, they are individuals, Eva is the thinker full of mischief and wonderment whilst Belle is the doer the first to crawl, walk talk yet a little clingy too, and they both fall in and out of the role of "the more dominant one". It will be interesting to see how they progress and if in fact the issue of who was the "first born" becomes a part of contention in their relationship as they get older. I do believe though, the fact that they already have two older siblings eliminates a lot of the competitiveness and for some lone sets of twins then an air of importance can be given to the older twin, thus leaving the youngest one feeling a little inferior.

So the next time someone asks "which one was born first?" will you think more carefully about the long term effects your reply can have on your child and their self esteem? Should parents of multiples consider withholding the information of who is the older twin to spare the child's feelings? Or is it irrelevant and unimportant in the grand scheme of things?

**Below is some information about the theory of birth order and it's importance. **

Psychologist Alfred Adler, a contemporary of Sigmund Freud, defined a set of characteristics to describe how a child's position within the family would actualize in his or her personality. Presented below is a simplified version of his theories, adapted from the Adler Institute website.

Adlerian Birth Order Characteristics


Position: Oldest

Family situation: dethroned by next child. Has to learn to share. Parent expectations are usually very high. Often given responsibility and expected to set an example.

Characteristics: May become authoritarian or strict. Feels power is his right. Can become helpful if encouraged

Position: Second

Family situation: Has a pacemaker, always someone ahead. Is more competitive, wants to overtake older child.

Characteristics: May become a rebel or try to outdo everyone. Competition can deteriorate into rivalry

Position: Middle

Family situation: Is "sandwiched" in. May feel squeezed out of a position of privilege and significance. Even-tempered, "take it or leave it" attitude.

Characteristics: May have trouble finding a place or become a fighter of injustice

Position:Youngest

Family situation: Has many mothers and fathers in older children. Never dethroned.

Characteristics: Wants to be bigger than the others. Can stay the "baby." Frequently spoiled

Don't Cry over spilt milk...

Well whoever said that had not just slipped on some very wet tiles on the way to the wheelie bin with a very large and stinky rubbish bag containing lots of smelly soiled Nappie's ands leftover baked beans and fish fingers! Arrgh i nearly broke my neck, i tell you kids are lethal shaking their milk bottles all over my kitchen floor without a care in the world and pooping for fun - the twins have pooed seven times today. Yes seven firkin times and it's not even tea time yet, oh the joys.

I am starting to despair now, i long to get through the day without hearing shrills of: "mummy wipe my bummmmmmmmm"
"mummy Mia said a swear word"
"mummy Sofia's wet her knickers"
"I'm hungry"
"I want a drink"
"I'm board"
"mummy Eva's took her nappy off and pooed on the floor"
"WHAAAA WHAAA WHAAAAA WHAAA"
"Can i have a biscuit, ice cream, yogurt.....etc,etc"
"Your a mean mummy, i want daddy"
"can i go on cebeebies?"
"I want the craft box NOW"
"Sofia's just smacked me"
"Mummy Mia pushed me over"
"Mummy the babies have poured all the pasta on the floor"
"oh no Sofia's just kicked the baby"
"I don't like you anyway"
"whaaa whaa whhaaa"
"Mummy can we go to the park"
"Mummy she won't let me play"
"It's not fair"
"Mummy I've spilt my juice"
"Mummy Sofia's turned the taps on and waters everywhere"
"Whaa whaaa whaaaa"


All of the above have been screamed at me today and that's just for starters, why oh why did i do this to myself...isn't life just great? Please someone tells me it gets better, because i think I'm losing the will to live!

I am in Love....

These are my new shoes aren't they lush?



Well i don't actually own them YET but that's just a small technicality, i will be up at the crack of dawn tomorrow to grab me a pair, just in time for my night on the town with the girlie's!
I spotted a pair of the flat version on one of the "yummy mummy's" at play group, and had an instant attack of the green-eyed monster. Whilst i was wearing my tatty 3 year old Next flip flops with half the dominates missing, she was swanning around in Vivienne Westwood getting play dough and squirty foam all over them at messy play, she must have money to burn. I am forsaking a new outfit, i don't get out much so Mr Bold was treating me to a new dress but when i found theses i just had to have them. So I'll be making do with an old outfit and purchasing these gorgeous shoes instead - at least I'll get my money's worth and they won't make my bum look big!

Wordless Wednesday....

Lazy summer mornings having fun

It's Negative.....

Yes Today i have taken a pregnancy test! I have been feeling rather sh$*y since Sunday, banging headaches, dizzy, stomach cramps, nausea, every single symptom which would indicate I'm pregnant other than sore boobs. The result is hardly surprising considering i have only just finished my period three days ago and well Mr Bold and I haven't exactly been getting "jiggy" with it of late -huh the chance would be a fine thing. I just wanted to rule out the possibility as i am understandably a little paranoid after having four kids in the space of 3 years and 3months! I opted for the 99p test i found in Home and Bargains as i didn't see the point in wasting money and well they had been shockingly accurate two years ago when i decided to rule out pregnancy on a whim then too!

I have breathed a huge sigh of relief, I'm not sure what i was expecting to feel since the majority of the times i have actually taken a test they're usually positive and i have always been pleased but this one was different. I finally think i am ready to stop pro creating, i didn't feel sad at all which is strange considering i still secretly pine for a SON, and now all that remains for me to do is get Mr Bold to have the dreaded "snip". He has been dodging this one since the twins were born, he too longs for a son one day but i could go on forever popping out girls and i think four is more than enough to be going on with. I love my girls unbelievably and i honestly think another sibling(brother or not) is the LAST thing they need right now, i am torn in enough directions at the moment and they all want a piece of me. I just don't think i could competently divide myself amongst more than four - i struggle now. So as i mourn the son i will never have i count my lucky stars for my four amazingly beautiful, intelligent, healthy funny girls, they are truly all i need and i am enjoying reclaiming a tiny piece of me back that has been lost to motherhood for five whole years - i realise now more than i ever have, it really doesn't last forever - in another five years it will all be over and my girls will be little lady's in the making, now is the time to Basque in the present.