Wednesday, 4 November 2009

The top ten tips of how NOT to host a children's party

This past week i have been run of my feet hosting TWO birthday parties in the space of three days and I've learnt a few tricks of the trade along the way that would have been a little helpful - hindsight is a wonderful thing isn't it?

1) When organising your child's party guest list be sure to actually invest in some invitations rather than rely on asking random mums you meet at playgroups to come along and promising them you will get an invite out to them soon - the next thing you know it's half term and you have no definite attendees for your daughters princess party.

2) Assuming MTV and other music Channel's will take care of the music for pass the parcel, musical statues and other planned party games is a BIG no no. You'll inevitably stumble across advert after advert while the children impatiently tear off all the layers and decide to play with the peppa pig train instead.

3) NEVER invest in £28 worth of pink tulle and declare to your whole family (rather smugly) that you will be hand making 12 tutu's
as presents for the birthday girls friends - the novelty wears off mid way through your third tutu and your left with a pile of useless tulle.

4)Always invest in extra prizes to prevent squabbling over who gets the last glow in the dark necklace or pumpkin glasses - lollipops are not a suitable alternative to any four year old and may result in major tantrums if you have the nerve to offer them.

5) Remember to inform your guests that the party is in fact fancy dress - it always helps i think and saves lots of embarrassment.

6) If you decide to include a pamper station for your little princess's to finish off their look complete with make up and nail polish NEVER EVER leave it unattended, you may find several little girls with nail polish on their eyelids and make up all over your cushions and walls.

7) Overlooking a "from and until" time frame on your Halloween party invitations can have serious consequences when at 3am you are still playing hostess to parents and trying to diffuse a fight that's just broke out on your doorstep between Superman and an inebriated Jack in the box.

8)Do not under any circumstances let your husband erect a huge gazebo for the party costing hundreds of pounds and turn a blind eye when he decides he's too tired to dismantle the thing. It will only end up being blown away by a huge gust of wind on top of your neighbours new conservatory roof - they will not be best pleased!

9) Be sure to place all your child's lovely presents out of reach from little hands - before you know it she, along with the help from several little pals, has opened all her gifts and you can't write thank you cards because you have not got a clue who sent what.

10) Never let your conscience get the better of you and against all your better judgment invite the child from hell down the road he will only wreak havoc causing the little girls to cry and head but the other little boys, whilst his mummy hides behind a goblet of vino trying to blot him out.

19 comments:

  1. Did all that actually happen to you? OMG it's too much!

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  2. I think I have "organised" the above mentioned party many times! When will I learn? At least this year we didn't have ours at home!!!

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  3. Aha now I remember why we dont do parties. I will bookmark this and read again when the minimads request one!!

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  4. I particularly liked the one about keeping the gifts out of reach and buying extra gifts to give away! Invaluable information!

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  5. All sound (and amusing) advice. We have only hosted two parties so far, and I believe that things will just get more complicated...

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  6. Sounds like a great time was had by everyone. You must be pleased you won't be doing the 2 parties in 3 days hit again for at least another 12 months! x

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  7. Mwa - yes indeed, it ALL happened in the space of three days and was a little exhausting to say the least :)

    Belle lulu - Thank god i'm not alone in hosting "party's from hell", and you've just added no 11 to the list:
    Never hold the party in your own home, use anny's house or better still hire a hall!

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  8. Madhouse - Be sure to NEVER give in even if mimimad begs with puupy dog eyes, it's sooo not worth the hassle :)

    Gaelikka - Glad to be of service, you'd have thought i was an axe murderer with the evil stares i got from disgruntled kids.

    Hearth-Mother - Your in for a world of pain, especially when it's time to tidy up!

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  9. Brits in Bosnia - I'm relieved i can rest for all of well, a few weeks, before the christmas madness ensues arggh x

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  10. Nail Polish on eyelids?! Sorry but that me giggle!!! :)

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  11. Emma louise - I did try to mask my smirk when informing their horrified parents :)

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  12. Hi there, good to have you back! Glad to read you had such joyous festivities. Hehe. I will pint out that list and put it into my parenting 101 folder. Thanks!

    PS: Gorgeous pictures of the twins and your daughters. And you! Am not so sure about that 'not so yummy mummy' claim in your header.

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  13. Metropolitan mum - Joyous is one way to describe it i suppose lol
    Thank you but i assure you i'm far from a yummy mummy, more like slummy but...damn i wish i knew how to accept a compliment :)

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  14. I'm tired just from reading this. This was like a bad play.

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  15. QueenBee - Yup a greek tragedy at it's best :)

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  16. That made me laugh out loud. Sticky nail varnish prints everywhere, children freaking out over where's-the-music-pass-the-parcel and a flyaway gazebo to top it all off. Look forward to hearing your tips the next time you host a grown-up party!

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  17. It all tells a tale. Loved the one about making 12 tutus, which tells a tulle tale!

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  18. eeeek!! you are one brave lady!!

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