Kids are in bed, no husband in sight, the television is all MINE......pure bliss! I'm feeling rather pleased with myself as i have managed to single handedly get all four kids fed, bathed and in bed with stories and cuddles by 7pm!!
Yes, i know it sounds like a miracle but i can assure you i used only my own charms and a little chocolate milk, no raphynol or any other substances were involved. I have pulled out all the stops tonight as last nights bedtime was a disaster, leaving me in serious doubt over my mothering skills.
Let me explain, it all started when i promised Mimi who's four going on fourteen that she could use the computer before bedtime:
"Mummy can i please , please have a game on cbeebies please...oh and a story from the tweenies mummy now?"
"Yes sweetie, of course you can, but mummy just needs to finish her work first OK? It's very important." (note by work i mean updating my status on facebook and checking out everyone Else's)
"Mummy now can i do my game?" 1 minute later
"yes Mi just a minute."
"Mummy ple....mu....game...ple.." falling asleep.
Some four hours later, Mimi awoke form her bed and began screaming uncontrollably about the sodding cbeebies game that mummy had not let her play, waking all three of her sisters in the process. Why do kids remember every bloody thing in minute detail?
So i tried to appease her with cuddles, promises that tomorrow evening she can have two games, three games four games,i even resorted to trying to calm her with a my little pony DVD but even that didn't work. I was about to loose my cool and blow my top when she hit me with:
"wah.....wah...I wish god had made me into a robot!" - WTF!
"Mimi don't say things like that honey you are a very lucky little girl, some children do...."
"nonono...wah...wah...i do i wish i was a robot and i didn't have these stupid bones and i was not a kiddie....then i could do whatever i want!....wah.."
Given that it was 11:30pm and i was seriously disturbed with what had just come out of my four year old's mouth i had no choice but to buckle and let her have her game and story time if she promised not to tell her 3 year old sister who was still awake upstairs.
So we sat in the dark, in our living room playing dress Mr Tumble followed by the story of Hansel and Gretal - Mimi's choice not mine. And as if i wasn't worried enough already, the fact my daughter chose a bedtime story about cannibalism left me in no doubt whatsoever that she is emotionally unhinged!
So i have made every effort today to assure her she is a special, cleaver, funny, kind, lovable, gorgeous little girl and so far there has been no mention of robots and the bedtime story she chose, i am pleased to report, had no mention of witches eating children.